Jun 30, 2008
Banana George One of the Sexiest Men Alive?
So, sexy men...hmm..
or...
Thanks again to Growingbolder.com for the love. HEY! BANANA!! Speak your mind brotha man!
CRB Service Announcement: Drunk Guy in Boat Was Not Us
Most of us would call a friend for a lift or hitch-hike or turn to a life on the streets of prostitution and drugs. This guy, however, had a much more novel, albeit, not smart ways of getting home, that being, stealing a rowboat and attempting to paddle home.
From "The Local", which is "Sweden's news in English" we have this excerpt from the article.
After a short while, the drunken man grew weary and passed out in the bottom of his boat, hoping that the currents would carry him safely to Swedish shores.We salute your can-do attitude and choice of water bound vessels, but, somewhere Darwin is shaking his head at a missed opportunity.
He was later discovered by the Danish coast guard, which had been alerted about what was thought to be an abandoned dinghy adrift in one of the world’s busiest shipping lanes.
Jun 29, 2008
Jump Finals
Kiwi put up a 209 (I think).
This tourny showed us that the new cats are here to stay. Dodd taking down his first pro tour win, Karina knocking off the big girls again, and Cale giving JB a run for his money. So exciting, and the webcasts bring it all to our couchs. woot.
oh yea and I won 2 shirts by getting two trivia questions correct. Totally beating out Scot Ellis on one. Take that SKIFLY, the CRB is the new kid on the block.
Slalom finals
Karina makes a hugh statement by taking down her second tour event in two weekends. She showed she is no fluke by running 38 every time she hit the water. Nicole Arthur gave Karina a run for her money but came up just short.
Recent graduate from Purdue's Pharmacy school laid it all on the line and put up some amazing scores.
JB has put up some awsome scores in years past and as he often does proved he was just to much for the competition and took home a nice check as well. Would be nice to see him get into 43 again some time.
Its a nightmare for Freddy and Jaret
Kyle Eade made the finals with a 210 (I belive) with both Freddy and Jaret puting up sub 210 scores.
Ryan Dodd has become a common site in the finals, but has just been a bit short of his fellow Canadian and Freddy but today may be his day.
Jason Seals, "Mr. Consistancy" as Scot Ellis calls him rounds out the finals. This is his chance to put another win on his record. He has spent a long time in the top guys shadows and here is his chance to show that he is one of the big dogs.
/could not find a good pic
//to lazy to keep looking
Sunday Pro Tour Stop
A CRB friend, Tadd, is a peep who visits our site, and we appreciate it...in fact he gave us a shout out today on the webcast.
We may or may not have read his comment right about Sunday, but, the rowboat is not going to be able to watch the events. But, if you are watching, please use the comment area to send in questions and comments to Tadd.
We can't watch the event, please let us know, give us your questions, and for goodness sakes, comment away.
Wakeboarding for the jihadists
Jun 27, 2008
Whoa, They Are Allready Skiing!!
In Friday's opening round of women's slalom, Australia’s Karina Nowlan and Canada's Whitney McClintock each scored 2 buoys at 39-1/2 feet off to lead the scoring. U.S. athlete April Coble-Eller and Great Britain's Nicole Arthur also cleared the 38 off pass, scoring 1 buoy at 39-1/2 feet off and a 1-1/2 buoys at 39-1/2 feet off, respectively. U.S. athletes Karen Truelove, Jennifer Leachman-LaPoint and Jill Knutson scored 3-1/2 buoys at 38 feet off, 1-1/2 buoys at 38 feet off, and 1 buoy at 28 feet off, respectively.Other scores: Australia's Emma Sheers, 4-1/2 buoys at 38 feet off; Canada's Breanne Wagner, 2-1/2 buoys at 38 feet off; France's Anais Amade, 1-1/2 buoys at 38 feet off; Great Britain's Sarah Green, 1-1/2 buoys at 38 feet off; Sweden's Josephine Edeback-Hurst, 2 buoys at 28 feet off; and Sweden's Hannah Edeback, ½ buoy at 38 feet off.Yeah, ok. just watch it and enjoy. By the way, we do have a CRB friend at the tournament who said that they would send some pictures or stories should they warrant it. So, that's cool.
Plus, Tadd, he is one of the announcers and a tour organizer, said in the comment section of an earlier post that they are giving away a bunch of free stuff on Sunday and even some stuff to the web-camers. So, bust out the Credit Cards, pay the man the dollas!!
Update:
Saturday at 10:00 Central. So, we missed the whole damn day. Well played.
Jun 26, 2008
Tom Jones Approves of this Wakeboard Tournament
A bomb is a device that generates and releases its energy very rapidly. The explosion creates a violent, very destructive shock wave.
Well, those two things sound very similar don't they? Well, at least for those lucky enough to copulate with the Rowboat.
RAWR!!!!
Well, Sex Bomb, the Band is playing this weekend at a local wakeboard tournament in Peterborough, Ontario called the Kawartha Lakes Wakeboard Open.
Lucky for them this year, or unlucky depending on your point of view, there doesn't appear to be the bikini competition right before they go on-stage. Which, for them, we suppose is good, its sort of hard to be a band named Sex Bomb made up of a bunch of 30 some year old dudes rocking cover versions of Counting Crows to get any attention after a bunch of babes wearing bikinis prance around.
Anyways, the Kawartha Lakes Wakeboard Open is this weekend in Peterborough and, if nothing else, they have an ass-load of sponsors. Or their pimped myspace page just barfed all over their website.
It is official the Kawartha Lakes Wakeboard OPEN 2008 will be downtown Peterborough. Beavermead Park on Little Lake will be the site for this years action packed event. Formerly called the KLWC ICEBREAKER,this annual event is in its fourth season. It is Peterborough and the Kawarthas premier wakeboard and summer event.Tee Hee, beaver.
Well, we think it all looks cool, what say you Tom?
Jun 25, 2008
The Lake of Sin: Update
haha!
From his comment:
I'm alive and well, thanks for the concern. Haven't skied for three weeks, I've been sidelined by irony. My house stayed dry, which is more than I can say for some parts of town. Hopefully I'll be able to ski again this week. As for Nola, sadly, her stash of coolers floated away.To bad about the coolers, or her stash, whatever pothead dog.
Thanks for the update homey, if you want the CRB's thoughts, just say screw it, drop your 135 horse fish and ski in the road, fire it up and take a wicked skurfer set!
Twiggy Test: Roam Board
the roam board features: E Core, Torsion Flex, ABS Side Wall and Layered Glass. Which is a fancy way of saying that it is a board made out of wood, it is flexible it has a siderail to it and a glass like laminate. So getting to the point this is what Twiggy had to say:
"It was interesting to ride. Probably the easiest thing ever to get up on. I got a little dizzy after my surface 3600. It is easy to hit rails on just like a snowboard (great way to cheat in rail jams). Cutting through the wake was rediculous, to say the least. Because of the wide stance and all when I cut toeside my back foot just dug in the water. The coolest thing I did with this is take a whip and bring the board up on its tail. (Take a look at picture below).
(note: it took like 30 minutes to find this damn picture)Conclusion: I spent about 20 minutes on this thing, that is good for me for the year. Correction I may take that whip faster after a few more PBRs. I would also like to thank the CRB for this chance to work with them, I am so greatful that you rescued me from Rykert's evil dog Nola."
Oh Nola-you are trouble....Jun 24, 2008
Wondering How Rykert is Doing
Well, it dawned on me recently that we haven't heard from our buddy in Iowa, especially in the wake of the whole Nola stealing our cooler episode and conspiring to make our rowboat extreamly difficult to pilot.
Well, we have left a couple comments on his latest post, something about a gross looking toenail, and haven't heard back and we got to thinking, with all the flooding in the mid-west, how has that affected him. So we googled Coralville, IA (where he says he is from, we just figured its Iowa, look for corn and Rykert has to be there somewhere) anyways it turns out that along with Ceder Rapids, IA, that Coralville (outside of Iowa City) got hammered pretty good as well.
Here is a google search string for Coralville, IA news in google. (just so you can try and stay up to date)
You can see a Photo Gallery of pics from the Press-Citizen, a newspaper in nearby Iowa City, and by near by, its like, right there.
Interesting to note though, is that with the flooding and what not going on in the mid-west, there is a dam in Coralville with the flooding and whatnot has uncovered some unique things from Iowa's past, like, 375 million year old bones from when Iowa was a tropical sea.
Speaking of which, 375 million year old bones? Is that what the "Girls Next Door" get everynight from Hef? Hi-Ohhh!!
Continue tangent: Is there a trio of more moraly bankrupt girls then those three? I get brain crabs just thinking about it.
All goofing aside, we hope you are doing alright and things aren't to totally out of whack in your neck of the woods.
We talked about the flooding in the mid-west and how it affected the show ski teams and Tommy Bartlett, but, we didn't get into what was happening further south.
We hope you are doing allright, and of course in the ironic twist, that you will be back on the water soon, you know, with out that same water making a mess of things.
So, from the CRB community, hope to hear from you soon, hope all is well, or as good as can be expected, and you let us know whats going on. We got a new CRB Cooler and its stocked with the finest meats and cheeses, a thing of funions and cold Old Milwaukee. So, drop by and help yourself.
Jun 22, 2008
Fenton, MI pro tour stop
That Was Kinda Weak
Note: Computer Screens at the CRB HQ = B&W Rabbit Ear TV
The image above is what we got when we logged onto the series of tubes to check out the action. Hmm...you have to pay to watch? I dunno about that. Maybe we hooked up our dial-up prodigy service wrong logged on to the wrong internet.
The organizers of this event have requested our 'Pay2view' service for the first time. Saturday will still be a 'Free2view' webcast but Sunday will only be available to viewers who pay $ 3.99 to watch for the event. Please visit the event website on WebCast-TV for more infomation and to Pre Purchase access for the event. 'Click Here'Far be it from us to say how things should be or shouldn't be, but, this seems to strike us as a bit silly. In that, if you aren't an avid waterskier, why would you spend money, any money, to watch something you aren't even sure you care about in the first place?
Maybe if someone was there or watched it on the webcast you could comment and give us a run-down.
Jun 20, 2008
This Food Smells Foul
For the people of West Lafayette, Indiana, their swim will be slightly longer, but, for reasons unknown to the CRB, the local Wastewater treatment plant decided to schedule repairs the same week as the "Taste of Tippecanoe", a local festival celebrating all things foody.
The festival takes place in West Layfayette along the banks of the mighty Wabash River where, we hope for the sake of this post making any waterski sense, the Purdue University skis. If they don't, well, just imagine a thriving local community that really enjoys their tubes and skurfers on the Wabash.
That will certainly curtail the local waterski activities for the local residents, of which, one would be the Purdue Collegiate Ski Team. We wonder what Purdue's most famous waterskier has to say about this?
Whats funnier is that in order to combat the odor emminating from the poop, the festival organizers bought a $1,700 machine to mask the odors. What can someone purchase for that much money? Why, a gigantic fan!! With new and better odors in it!
+
=
DOLLAS!!!!
The CRB is thinking about putting our best investagative reporter on this situation, something seems foul. We smell something amiss. This could be a shitty situation.
/pun attack.
We tend to think the inventor of this company, the smelly fan company, is actually responsible for this "scheduled" repair at the wastewater treatment plant. Think about it.
Step 1. Design anti-shit smell fan thing
Step 2. Find local food festival
Step 3. ???
Step 4. Profit!
Holy Smokes! What a good idea!
Can you imagine skiing around and smelling shit all over the place? All though if there was shits everywhere, you could slalom around them like a course!
Back to work Poopsmith!!
Can you imagine the sales tactics that this company must use to sell their anti-shit smell technology?
WardenNortonLOL: Lord! It's a miracle! Man up and vanished like a fart in the wind!
taterT.O.T: /cuts check
WardenNortonLOL:Don't you mention money to me again. You sorry SON OF A BITCH! NOT IN THIS ROOM, NOT EVER.
taterT.O.T: sorry? You are being obtuse.
/drops pen
Whoops...dang, I can't find the pen...
WardenNortonLOL: I want that pen found. Not tomorrow, not after breakfast - *now*.
taterT.O.T: You certainly are demanding. Anyways, I have another one.
/scribble
Here you go. thx!
***ONLINE HOST*** taterT.O.T has left the chatroom
WardenNortonLOL: /puts check in bible, puts bible in safe in wall
/turns around
Get my stuff down t'laundry. Two suits for dry-clean and a bag of whatnot. Tell 'em if they over- starch my shirts again, they're gonna hear about it from me.
Babblingbrooks: /hangs self
Twiggy Test: Death by Slalom Binding...but they're so comfy!
There is also the good old rubber bindings which do a great job or ripping all of the hair of the top of your foot. Who needs coffee before there morning set, when you have foot hair being ripped out? Who are we kidding? When was the last time any of us on the CRB got up before noon?
Hey somebody has to keep the PBR stock going strong! Anyways I digress....what the hell was I talking about? Why am I up so early? Oh yeah, the bindings. So wakeboarders have these pillow bindings where are the skiers? Never fear cuz Radar is here. Radar has embraced the custom fit binding and made a pretty sweet hard/soft shell binding. The best of both worlds right? Maybe, maybe not.
They sure look sweet! So you can get the insert molded to your foot which is super comfy...and putting your foot in isn't like kicking a wall. The whole design is really cool. They mount to a custom plate which then mounts to your ski "allowing your ski to flex naturally." Whatever the fuck that means.
Pillow like liners....
Custom plate thingy....
So we stuck twiggy the waterskiing squirrel on them and saw what he had to say. After blowing his little squirrel load as he put his foot in the binding we threw him in the water (personal note: squirrels have sharp claws and look funny when wet). Twiggy tore up the course and got his damn swerve on. This is what twiggy had to say:
"Well, the bindings were super responsive. They respond like hardshells but are way more comfortable. The only thing I was worried about was not coming out of the binding."
Well Twiggy's worries came true as he rounded 4 ball at 41' off and 2 mph he took a bad out the front and the ski stayed right with him. We always liked Twiggy but now he is buried in a cardboard box behind the CRB mansion.
In all actuality, this innovation in skiing is really cool to see. Yeah they are a little scary but it is just one of those things you have to get used to, who needs ACLs anyway?Keep looking for new Twiggy Tests, we are currently training a new Twiggy in the pond behind the CRB mansion. If any ski companies would like the CRB to test there new equipment...feel free to send us a promo!
**Ed. Note: Promo stuff can be sent to,
CRB Headquarters
attn: Rowboat Abides
c/o The Internet**
Update: To fill everyone in this is a one day test just to see how the binding responds. This was done with a single boot and a adjustable toe plate. Twiggy's partners and the future Twiggys will continue to test the RS-1 binding. Just to make everything clear I personally like the idea of the RS-1, but am unsure as to its saftey as of yet. Only future test's will tell.
Jun 19, 2008
Quick Notes: Its Never to Early to Plan for Next Year
The 2009 Collegiate All-Star Championships will be held May 16-17, 2009 at Beaver Lake in Ahoskie, NC.Tee Hee...Beaver!
Also from NCWSA.COM
The west continues to grow as the University of Utah has started a Waterski Team. Norman Butler is the team captain and hopes to compete this fall.Assuming that the team will be made up of 3 or 4 guys and 30 women. Get it? Cuz they are Mormons out there and they have lotta wives?
Hello? Is this thing on?
/tap tap
/crickets
Atlanta to Midwest: Can we have some of your water?
Daddy, can we sit in the front row?
The edge of the Five Seasons Ski Site.
They are saying even after the water comes back down it will take months to sanitize all of the equipment and the park itself. They are expecting a thick sludge left from the massive amounts of sewage dumped up river by flooded water treatment plants.
Daddy why dident the river bring a plastic bag?
This is a house on Lake Delton on the same lake as the Tommy Bartletts ski show site. I don't see how any of these people are recovering nicely as they were not allowd to get flood insurance. Or all of the skiers who lost their jobs as their stage decided to make an end run around the dam and at the same time take a few homes with them.
Damn, in the future Ill pay for the girl scout cookies, those girls can be mean bitches.
Of course then there is the CRB ski site, save and out of the way of all the flooding affecting our friends in the midwest.
Ah peace and serenity
Oh come on now,not you again what did I anger the waterski gods?
AH CRAP
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