Feb 26, 2008

How is That Spelled?

Interesting thought over at the Rykert lake of indiscretion and gluttony, how the hell is the word "Waterski" spelled? Is it Waterski or Water Ski?

Our take? Its Waterski. One word. Then again, any word processor or spell checker makes it Water Ski.

Damn. The. Man.

Comment on the sinful site is as follows...we are inclined to agree.

Water is a modifier. So it is two words. Snow Skiing or Water Skiing. Both are acts of skiing, only the phase of the water underneath changes. I believe the argument to the contrary would cite baseball, softball, and basketball as examples. In that case, I offer this solution: the verb is one word (I'm going to go waterski.) and the noun is two (I just bought a bitchin' flourescent water ski.).

Well, thanks for that smartypants.

We're at War: The sinful lake

Feb 24, 2008

Return of the 80s

Free style slalom in Australia, bringing back tricky slalom. SWEEET

Waterskiing Vid Summer 08

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While their website may be one of the most clustered and confusing webistes ive seen in awhile, they have some of the best barefoot videos anywhere. This one features Andre De Villiers and makes it look so easy.

Feb 23, 2008

Tragedy Strikes in Collegiate Skiing

So alot of our post's on here are very sarcastic and often humorous. However, for once we have something of a much more serious demeanor. On Saturday the 16th the parents of Brian Bajaj, an alum of Kansas State, and Kevin Baja, a freshman at Kansas died in a plane crash. They were flying their plane to compete in a marathon when low visibility caused there plane to crash shortly after takeoff from Benton Airpark east of Wichita.

Our thoughts and prayers go out to the entire Baja family. Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers also. In lieu of flowers, a memorial fund is established at Wichita State University in Ashok and Trish's name. Donations should be sent to:Ashok and Trish Bajaj Memorial Scholarship Fund c/o WSU Foundation1845 N. Fairmount, Box 2 Wichita, KS 67260-0002For more information contact Natalie Olmsted at 316-978-6842. There is further information on the incident at kansas.com. They have guestbooks that you can sign for both Ashok and Trish. Once again our deepest sympathy goes out to the Baja family at this time of distress.

Feb 22, 2008

what kinda sport has websites like ours?

We all want waterskiing to be the sport we know it can be, but how does this sad excuse for a world organisation website show that? Come on now horse polo, darts, and even curling association websites make us the IWSF website look like an elementry school kid made it. USA Waterski's website is ok, but still not much to look at.

Lets put some effort into this and maybe we can show people that we actually have some clue what a real sport is. Or we can remain on the slow spiral we are stuck in. Come on this is the Internet age, hell its been the internet age since the early 90s, might be about time for our leaders to figure that out and bring us out of the stoneage.

Or we could let these guys continue to show the world what our sport is about.

For your chill out pleasure

If you haven't got on board the Neil Young train at any point in your life, we think you are missing out. But, taste in music is like taste in women, some people like shitty women and some like awesome women.

That analogy makes no sense, but, if you like the Jazz and the Neil, we recommend you check out this awesome cover of Neil Young's "Deep Forbidden Lake", which, probably is a song about your dream ski lake.

Sure...Can it Fit in a Boat?

Dear God,

Its the CR

CRB here again, of the many things that we occasionally ask you for: more money, better jobs, increased prowess in the bedroom (pssh, like we need that), central a/c in the mobile CRB Command Center, a tasty steak for dinner, Miller High-Life on-demand, ability to tele-port, levitation, x-ray vision, 15% of more savings on car insurance, big speakers, high-quality porn, a better relationship with mother nature and the like, we have a new request that maybe you can help us with.

See, we found over on Jalopnik.com, which is a website all about cars and what-not, this post about a freaking crazy engine that has about a billion horsepower and four-turbos.

So, here is our proposition, ready?

We will stop bothering you about three of the above listed topics, however, the girl stuff...you are on your own dude, explain that to me and maybe we would go back to church...but anyways, if you would somehow find a way to get this motor into our boat.

Granted, we don't have a boat of our own...but, you are the all-seeing, mr. know-it-all, we are sure you could figure this out.

Thanks, oh, and let Hunter Thompson know that the CRB says 'sup.

Feb 21, 2008

Who is Mike Murphy?

He's not just some wicked old dude from California! He actually did a whole bunch of stuff but even cooler are some of the videos of him on youtube. according to the hydrofoil hall of fame:

Over the past 43 years Mike has participated and excelled in just about every aspect of skiing. For much of that time he has been considered the best in the world at kneeboarding, hot dog slalom skiing, and hydrofoiling. He co-invented and pioneered two waterski products enjoyed by tens of thousands, the kneeboard and sit down hydrofoil. He has been an innovator of new tricks, with over 50 to his name, and the list is still growing. These are just a few of the highlights of a skiing career marked by versatility and longevity.
Pretty sweet dude. Check out this video of him doing some old school skiing.


No clue as to why stuff like this, or this, or this, is so funny but it is. Certainly we have jumped on the bandwagon a little but with some LOL pleasurez and some FAIL before. Well, why not strap in tight and enjoy some more FAIL?

Feb 20, 2008

Bringing back the Malivette!

Are you going through a midlife crisis? Do you have way too much of that pesky money on your hands? Do you always wish you could waterski but never really wanted to get off the couch and stop watching the speed channel? If this sounds like you we have the best every old ass, rich ass, poser boat for you. That is right ladies and gentleman Malibu, yes the dirty bu, has brought back the Malivette. A corvette styled ski boat, that well doesn't have a pylon... Mastercraft tells it best.

OK, so they may be a little bias over there at Mastercraft you be the judge.

Do you see a pylon, cause I don't. What the hell is Mailibu doing making a ski boat without a pylon, is that even a ski boat. Can a ski boat comany make a non-ski boat? The world is comming to a end!! If you want to help the world come to the end, you can pick up either a coupe for $82,900 or a Z06 model for $102,700. Hell if your midlife crisis is really ruff just get the car to pull the boat and make it a even $200,000!

Gotta admit that is a pretty sweet picture. Yet, that would be the dumbass who would be getting his car pulled out of the lake by a tow truck.

"Damnet woman I said put it in drive not REVERSE!!!" Weekend Wally. Oh how we can't wait to see Wally and Mrs. Wally at the launch this summer!


Lets See the Momentum Boys Top This!

OK, so we have had our share of nifty waterski videos recently, the Momentum video, the Edged In Water, the Secret Spot (sounds like porn...but, hey a mix of Waterski and Porn would be a hot seller), but, if this video promo for some video we are guessing is called Red Bull Blackout or just Blackout or whatever, well, either way the bar has been raised.

Feb 19, 2008

Nightmare's Online

Freddy Krueger is online!!

Don't worry it isn't another Friday the 13th movie. Freddy Krueger the current world record jump holder has a website and it's pretty cool. He has stuff for sale as well as "virtual coaching". It isn't where you put some big thing over your face and pretend your jumping. Freddy actually has you send in you jump video and he will give you a coaching lesson on it. P.S. this is alot cheaper than ski school, about 100 bucks!

The site also has some chronicles by Freddy about what he is up to, some sweet pictures and a bio page. Did you know Freddy drives a '95 Jeep Cherokee while his wife (Karen Truelove) gets a sweet Infiniti FX 35. I wonder what the Cherokee looks like.....

Don't forget the sweet Mastercraft Prostar 190 Nightmare that is behind there.

Check out Freddy Krueger's website and buy a sweed "I'd Hit That" shirt!


Feb 18, 2008

Harry Caray - 10 Years?

Going slightly off-topic here, but, can you believe its been 10 years since Harry Carey passed away? Anyone who grew up in the mid-west, or for that matter, spent their formative years watching baseball on t.v, you can be damn sure that at some point you caught a Cubs game on WGN and were sucked in by the mind-bending weirdness that is/was Harry Carey.

Other sites and other people with better handles on the English language then this one have no doubt spouted off awesome platitudes over the man, his broadcasting career, legendary night life in the Chicago-land area and his awesome charisma within the broadcast booth, we to feel a very close connection to Harry.

People ask why are you a Cubs fan, you aren't from Illinois, thank god for that anyways, but when you get home from school as a little boy or girl and flip on the tube, what did you watch? Transformers, G.I Joe or, if the time and season was right, the Cubbies on WGN.

Sure, he worked for the Cardinals and White Sox and wherever else in his past, but, everyone associates Harry Carey with the Cubs.

He brought baseball to the normal people, not the stat geeks (yes, you are geeks, get over it) and not to the people who lived and died with the intricacies of baseball strategy, but to the everyman...the drunk who wanted to have a good time, watch some baseball, and maybe catch a babe with big hooters in the bleachers.

So, as a tyke growing up, this became what baseball was and he was the conduit to what a sport, a game should be.

Besides, have you ever been to a Cubs game? Jesus Christ, its Chicago, easily one of the greatest places in the world. When things are right in that town, shit, things are right everywhere.

The girls are amazingly good looking, the neighborhoods live and breath with its own unique style, the city itself is a world by itself and no one embodied the unique and awesomeness that is that town better.

Thats why when people ask why are you a Cubs fan, because growing up and watching baseball and listening to Harry Caray, how could you not?

Ten Years? Holy Cow.

Be sure to check out these two sites for some great perspective.

Home Run Derby

Joe Sports Fan

And what better then some drunken Harry ramblings!

Feb 16, 2008

Feb 15, 2008

The Groundhog Bounty!

Water skiers Unite!!

The Lake of Sin has started the ball rolling, we need to kill that fucking varmint!

Here are the details.

Basically, we need to bond together to get this damn winter over with and in order to help is to off the bastard who has doomed those of you who are stuck in the freezing ass, snow covered, bullshit that is this winter for y'all.

So, click over to Rykerts site and pledge your support!

Are They Skiing at Daytona?

Say what you will about the ill-fated World Waterski Pros, and subsequently the Ski Fly boys/girls/whatever that brought waterskiing to one of the biggest events on the planet, the Daytona 500, but...

well, they brought our sport to a huge-gigantic audience.

So, now, with the Daytona 500 only a few days away, we have to ask...

Where the hell is the skiing? or coverage? or...anything?

Did this die? Where did it go? Have we used up our allotment of question marks for one post? Besides, anything that can get a babe like Danyelle Bennett in-front of more people can't possibly be a bad thing..right?

Feb 14, 2008

Doing that thing we do... behind a car?

Cheaper then a new Mastercraft.

The Circus Has Come To Town!!

Yey clowns and stuff! Well, not really but close enough.

Macus Brown the poster child of west coast slalom is doing a ski tour this summer.

"For 3 months, beginning May 2008, Marcus and his crew will travel coast to coast with a custom RV and MasterCraft boat. The tour will offer top notch water ski clinics, training programs, free ski days with a Pro, charity benefit days, public outreach days, celebrity appearances, gear demos, autographed posters, magazines, DVD's and more. The tour vehicle will be on display at 4 Pro events throughout the summer. Additionally, the Face to Face tour will receive coverage and advertising space in the Water Ski Magazine, as will as coverage on Local TV stations, in newspapers and appearances throughout the country. With the ability to directly reach over 10,000 people and hundreds of thousands indirectly, this tour is and opportunity nobody can afford to miss."

Thats really cool and all but the real reason to go is to check out his sweet 40th anniversary eddition Mastercraft Prostar 197 and matching semi.

Sorry Marcus, love the west coast slalom stuff and the dreds but that boat is way prettier than you!

Check out facetofacetour.com for more info, you can even get Marcus' number off the site.

Feb 13, 2008

Hot Damn!! I Never Rode in a Convertible Before

Is that right? Well, I guess you are about ready then, aren't you...

Were your friends, were not like the others, man, really.

No more of that fucking talk or I will put the leaches on you, understand...


And with that we have ourselves a real, sort of, actual Pro Waterski Tour!!

The Mastercraft Pro Waterski Tour.

The tour will consist of six events, in such exotic locales like, Fenton, MI and Akron, Ohio...Holy Shit, fire up the Chevette son, we are off to Akron!!!
The six tour events, which are supported by both MasterCraft and local MasterCraft dealers, will replace the traditional qualifying rounds of the U.S. Open. The MasterCraft PWST includes five slalom events, two men’s jumping events, one women’s jumping event, one men’s and women’s tricks event, and one overall event. The overall event will determine the U.S. Open overall champion, while all other events in the series will be considered U.S. Open qualifying events.

2008 MasterCraft Pro Water Ski Tour

May 30-June 1 (Slalom)
Talking Rock, Ga.

June 14-15 (Jumping)
Zachary, La.

June 20-22 (Slalom)
Fenton, Mich.

June 27-29 (Slalom/Men Jumping)
Akron, Ohio

July 5-6 (Tricks, Overall)
Santa Rosa Beach, Fla.

Aug. 29-31 (Slalom)
Catawba, N.C.
Sept. 13 (U.S. Open)
Lake Buena Vista, Fla.

Sept. 19-21 (Slalom)*
Brentwood, Calif.
* Will serve as first qualifying round for 2009 U.S. Open.

MasterCraft Sponsoring Pro Water Ski Tour

Feb 12, 2008

You Are Dead to Me

Besides posting the hilarious video from Lewis Black on his site, our boy Rykert, has been bitching up a storm about the never ending winter.

The mighty CRB tenticles spread wide, and deep, so it goes without saying that we feel your pain sir.

We are as sick of this god damn winter weather and the fucking piles of snow and wrecked cars that come with it.

Well, about 10 days ago that little bastard rat named Punxsutawney Phil, climbed out of his hole and decided that what we needed, what the world needed...nay...what our civilization needed, was..MORE FUCKING WINTER!!

You are dead to us.

Feb 11, 2008

When One is Just Not Enough

Update in the Rowboat, we have moved over a bit and let a couple new members join up in our pursuit of waterski dick jokes and idiocy here at the CRB headquarters.


So, in addition to the Rowboat Abides...thats me, or whatever stupid-ass name I feel like using, we now have in our stable:

Old Dirty Bass Fisherman


CRB Minion (very original name, BTW)

Anyways, say hello, or fuck it, don't, we don't care. A beer would be pretty awesome right now...


note: the real reason for this post is that I can't stand that chicks rule crap..what is this 1990? Chicks Rule, Guys Drool....blahhhhhhhhhhhh.....whatever.

Feb 8, 2008

Exclusive Interview: Dallas Friday

So after some CRB minion so carelessly tried to crown a new CRB Girl, we have an exclusive interview with Dallas Friday.

Dallas was, shall we say, a little displeased with the way in which some [girl] was splashed all over the pages of the CRB and thus directly in to the millions...thousands...even seven computer screens all over the world.

The following is our exclusive REAL Interview with Dallas:

I need to pee

We are here with Dallas Friday, who was recently challenged for the CRB Girl crown. We have heard thru the grapevine (aka we made it up) that you are less then pleased about this development, what do you have to say to defend your crown?



Well we know that, but as Alex showed she hangs with quite the talent, I saw Cale Burdik, Zach Worden and some other very talented skiers in her entourage, where is your crew at?



Wow, Morgan Freeman and Owen Wilson, impressive but Alex has been pulling some big press recently, how can you compete with that? I mean really there is none higher. What kind of press have you been getting that can top that?




Ok you win on that one, can we get a kiss?


/Kicks CRB in face



That did not go as planned

Well, thanks for your time.

Feb 4, 2008

New Dallas?

As all you loyal CRB readers know we here at CRB love Dallas Friday, this will never change! Dallas we love you more than most things on this earth, yet we feel it as our duty to bring this to the world’s attention. This month's USA Waterski female athlete is Alex Lauretano. Alex is an up and comming skier, and not to bad looking. Just take a look at that cute smile! Dallas once again she has not replaced you. Please don't get in some crazy, hair pulling, clothes ripping, girl fight on our regard. You are still our favorite.

How can you not love that, ummm smile....

Alex is the girl in the lower right. This photo is with members of the USA U21 Worlds team where she took home silver in women's jump as well as overall. A short bio on Alex she is 20 years old (pheww), a student, skier and nanny. Could she be the future Dallas of 3-event? Oh yea, some dude, Zack Worden, was also skier of the month he's in the picture somewhere.

January Athletes of the Month

World Record = FAIL!!!

If at first you don't succeed....

....Try, Try Again!!!

Feb 2, 2008

USA Waterski Gods decree

So the gods of the land of waterski have handed down a new decree. No more focus on tournaments and the pros...

Instead we will focus on ....

Or perhaps not

Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...