Nov 28, 2008

Make Your Voice Heard/Seen

Vote on the poll for the person who had the biggest impact in '08. The nominees are:

Caroline Hensley
Regina Jaquess
Freddy Krueger
Alex Lauretano
Chris Parrish
Storm Selsor
Jimmy Siemers
Zack Worden
April Coble-Eller

Vote HERE (new window)

Nov 26, 2008

CRB Give Thanks

The CRB wishes everyone a happy Thanksgiving. Enjoy football and gluttony and the normal dysfunctional family non-sense that we all go though.

The CRB gives thanks to many things, the people who actually happen to check out the site, to the miracle that is waterski, the astonishingly hot Danielle Lloyd, the ODBF keeping me on the payroll despite my constant pleas to be gone, our peeps rykert and mitch and cris and anonomous, and anonomous and the other anonomous, and thankful for fun new changes in life that bring people to weird places and finally thankful for the Minion to finally quit calling and asking for bail money.

But, mainly we give thanks for all the things that we have to be thankful for.

We hope everyone has a great weekend. Danielle, Nola, Maria, Officer Buck, Dallas, Danyelle, and all of our other assorted CRB characters will be stopping by the CRB HQ this weekend to delve into what is left of the cooler, probably stepping up this weekend to have even FINER smoked meats and maybe even a bottle of Wild Turkey to go with the turkey.

OH!! Jumping Turkey, I see you have a ski rope made of Wild Turkey...Well Played friend, well played. C'mon on in, have a seat...

Scoot over Danielle....

Remembering the past

Tribute to Ken White.

I know this has been on here before, but I love the vid and it got me to thinking about waterskiings past and subsequently its future. In the 70s-90s waterskiing was light years ahead of where it is now, what was it that put skiing in that situation and what has brought us down from that pedistal we were on?

This video is a tribute to the life of one of waterskiings greats, Ken White was not only great becuase he could kick your ass all over the lake and do a two ski linestep with 60 inch trick skis faster then most of us can do a back, but because his heart was all waterskiing. Not like the whiners and bitchers that populate the ski flies or some of the other boards* out there.
*hortons board is good

But from what I can see there is really no productive forum of any sort that really pushes the sport forwards, nothing out there really bringing new blood into the traditional 3 event world. Collegiete is doing well with college kids, some do stick around, but many just take advanatge of the parties and 4 years of easy access and then go on their way, maybe skiing on a buddys boat once in awhile but never adding much more then a weekend wally does to the sport. Show skiing does perhaps the best job of any of the diciplines in going out and going after young skiers and even non skiers. Learn to ski clinics and summer camp/summer school type clinics, bring in skiers or at least introduce the sport to many more people then our private lakes do.

Why cant we grow above the petty "City Slicker 2" bullshit that is spewed at each other and maybe attempt to do something good or useful for our sport? I see so many posts from people saying stuff like that, but how is that benefiting our sport?

It looks like a show-ski team in Madison, WI, The Mad-City Ski Team, have been putting on an event called "The Clean Lakes Festival", well shit, that makes sense!

Skiers use the lake Check
Clubs want new members Check
Chance to clean up the lakes Check
Good press for club Check
Good press for sport Check
Not being a CSII Douche Bag Check

Or we could continue to focus on a lost cause.

Olympic Update: Seven sports fighting for inclusion in the 2016 Summer Olympics
presented their cases to the International Olympic Committee last Friday. The
leaders of baseball, roller sports, softball, golf, karate, squash and rugby
(seven-a-side) met the commission ahead of next year's vote. Water skiing did
not make the cut to make a presentation. The IOC has set a limit of 28 sports in
2016, meaning the sports were vying for the last two available slots. 

final decision will be made at the Olympic Congress in October 2009 in
Copenhagen. Incidentally, last September the International Water Ski
Federation’s Executive Board announced that it would move forward with a plan to
conduct a water ski exhibition at the Olympic Congress in Copenhagen. Stay

Straight off the editors note pad

Seems sensable to me... but then again I am an anonymous poster, so I got nothing...

Nov 24, 2008

Insomniac Movie Theatre: Into Monday Love

Following the first ever real live-blog the ODBF asked me to sum up our experience and give people something to think about for Monday.

Now, initially, the obvious question is this....Why me? You gave me the job of just doing random off-topic bits here and there and thats it. If you filter through my stuff I haven't done anything that does anything regarding waterskiing since my retirement. I talk about basketball or whatever.

Anyways, its obviously because, if you were a part of the live-blog, because the ODBF can't afford to have the ebay piped into the pad and therefor relies on the Rowboat to do heavy lifting. Which I am happy to do.


1) The live blog was fun. Granted there wasn't much outside participation, but, we enjoyed it. Basically it was a long I.M chat convo on a website, but, Mitchell showed up to say hello and, well, what the hell right? Looks as though the ODBF wants to do a bunch more, so hopefully people drop by and say hello.

2) Weekend of college Foot-Ball. Texas Tech was bent over a barrel, and despite what anyone says, Texas should be the second ranked team and Florida should be third. Hope College? Fifth.

Fifth? Yeah, thats the Hope College Waterski Team, give them some helmets and shoulder pads and I will take that over a Sam Bradford Tim Tebow Colt McCoy love child anyday of the week.

3) This new season of 24 is going to be epic

4) Chris Berman gets alot of shiz from the intertube crowd, but, its not 1/2 bad sometimes. Yeah, I said it.

5) I aint got no conversations with nobody. - LenDale White.

6) Does anyone else cook dinner, then like, three hours later you are hanging out or whatever and then come back inside and still sort of smell what you cooked and think, "damn, that smells good. I need some leftovers" even if you aren't hungry and you just eat the hell out of what you have left? No? yeah, neither.

7) Fun video of Freddy dropping the puck.

8) Anyone else hear, purchase, etc, the new Guns and Roses album? I heard some of it online, streamed somewhere, and basically....whatever.

9) The VW commercials with the old school Bug make me want to buy a old school bug, not a damn Routon. Serious. Maybe a GTI....thats about it. those are cool and fast. but, a Caravan in VW clothes? no thanks. A Jetta? I'll pass. A passsssat? No thanks.

10) How fun would it be to run a pass route and have someone like Kurt Warner or Aaron Rodgers or someone throw you a pass? I would saw off your left leg for that.

Anyways, have a great monday.

Nov 21, 2008

Bill Nye the barefoot guy

No idea who these kids are or who got in with Bill Nye to get this on TV, but props to them. Advertisers know that the way to a persons check book is thru their kids, well then keep up with ideas like this. Get on the saturday morning TV shows and show off our sport.

When I was on a college ski team we knew that you had to grab the incoming freshmen in the first week before they joined other clubs, we all have a limited amount of time and money. Get the young kids involved in our sport, if it takes morning shows like this or cartoons or learn to ski days with the local youth organizations, its all worth it. Our sport saw some very good growth in the college ranks but we still see USAWS bleeding members. Bring in the youngins.

Remember: Live-Blog

Remember peeps, Live-Blog on Sunday the 23rd at 7:00 PM...ugh...Central, for those of you in regular time zones.  

Jack Bauer: Son, part of getting a second chance is taking responsibility for what you did wrong in the first place.

Whoa...thats deep.

Nov 20, 2008


It looks like Cypress Gardens, the first professional ski show and the home of many waterskiing firsts, is adding a water park in an attempt to pull the park out of the trend of heavy losses they have been seeing for the past few years.

But it seems that some of the older crowd are unhappy with the addition of roller coasters and a water park.
Well if their idea of a water park includes gators that would make me unhappy too!
As Cypress Gardens waterski show is the longest running live entertainment act in the country today, so here is to hoping they can turn around the losses and keep the show going.

look over there! Flowers!

Nov 19, 2008

Creationism of waterskiing.

"In the Spirit of Charles Darwin, the Origin of Species, PJ McMillan is on a voyage to find the next level of Water Skiing."
Not really sure what that means, but the vid looks good!

check it out here

Nov 18, 2008


The ODBF put me on a quest to do some photoshop magic, i.e, to continue a point from a previous post about Freddy breaking a world record and like no one there to see it, so the idea was to photoshop a freddy jump into a football stadium full of people.

whatever, anyways, in searching around for pictures i happened upon this site.

A site not unlike this (notice the double negative, thats college for ya) and its a pretty standard run-down of hot girls in sporting events at the Olympics.

However, one caught our eye. Can you find it?

I understand the Sacramone and the Misty May thing, but, waterskiing isn't even an olympic sport...and Nymph?
In Greek mythology, a nymph is any member of a large class of mythological entities in human female form. They were typically associated with a particular location or landform. Others were part of the retinue of a god, such as Dionysus, Hermes, or Pan, or a goddess, generally Artemis.[1] Nymphs were the frequent target of satyrs.

Nymphs live in mountains and groves, by springs and rivers, and in valleys and cool grottoes. They are frequently associated with the superior divinities: the huntress Artemis; the prophetic Apollo; the reveller and god of wine, Dionysus; and rustic gods such as Pan and Hermes.
She is pretty good, but, I have a hard time believing that she lives in a mountain by springs and rivers.

Note: First CRB Live-Blog Coming Soon

There isn't much in the waterski world to get really excited about either via your tv or on your commodore 64, but, this coming Sunday, 11/23, the CRB crew, the Rowboat and the ODBF (minion? in jail) will be live-blogging the season premier of 24.

It relates to waterski because, well, we like it. Besides, its Sunday night and for the vast majority of you all, you aren't skiing and what better way to spend an evening with your fake online friends?

Waterski website, Jack Bauer kicking ass, Guns, and Danielle Lloyd, what more could you want?

Join us!

Danielle Lloyd? Why would you mention that, she has nothing to do with....


but, danielle, my boss may...


/snaps random pedestrians neck

here you go.


photo credit

(ed note. its strongly recomended you click on the danielle pic, 1. because her eyes look into your soul and 2. look at the dude over her left shoulder, very pleased that she is there)

Nov 12, 2008

Hambone raps about winter

This is stolen from the "Next" topic on skifly, but I liked it so now its here. Ham is a man after my own heart, loves skiing, beer and hates the cold.

Here We Go Again, It's That Time of Year
Ode To Winter

I hate winter with it’s wind and it’s cold,
Getting dark so early, really gets old,
The lakes are deserted, No boats out there,
If you did go skiing you’d have ice in your hair.

I hate winter, I’ve hated it for years,
I hate winter, more than last year,
I hate that there are no leaves on the trees,
I hate that there are no little bikinees,

I miss all the sun, I miss all the fun,
I miss the skiing whether lost or won.
I miss the starting dock and all the trash talking.
I miss the late cuts, no fair balking.

I hate winter, I’ve hated it for years,
I miss my post-skiing friends and cold beers,
I hate winter for almost all reasons,
Except when the Titans are having a good season.

The shortest day of the year is always in December,
It helps me think of Spring, It helps me remember.
It is downhill from there, the days, they get long.
I think of warm weather and skiing, I can’t be too wrong

I can’t wait to run bouys,
I can’t wait to make turns,
I’m glad not to be at Wizard
Hangin’ out with Vern.

I hate winter, I guess, I always will.
Maybe one day, I will get my fill,
But, until then I’ll hate winter , No it’s not a fake,
I’ll hate winter til’ I get back to the lake!

Ham Wallace

Nov 7, 2008

Up All Night!!

Coming up this weekend on the other side of the world (+13 hours for EST) so about as other side as you will get, will be some hot action on the water.
Very good mental images

I mean the hell its spelled, its in Malaysia. Appearently the have coconuts there.
yummmmm coconut milk...
yea whatever
But the big news is it is being webcast!
Schedule: (local time in Malaysia)
Day 1 Preliminary Rounds
1045 World Cup Intro
1100 Slalom Men and Women
1330 Tricks Men and Women
1600 Jump Men and Women
1245 World Cup Intro
1300 Slalom Men and Women
1430 Tricks Men and Women
1530 Jump Men and Women
1715 Prize Ceremony
Sweet I am in! Oh wait, +13 hours for east coast means um, shit thats real early in the morning. BAR TIME WATER SKIING. I got a ticket the last time i did that.

Nov 6, 2008

Nice Whirlybird....To Face

Seriously, I am like the guy who retires from a job but yet keeps kinda hanging around because otherwise you go nuts with boredom. Besides the boredom part that's me.

Its like breaking up with someone, you couldn't stand them when you were together, but, now you have no one to make you wash dishes, take out the dog, shower on a daily basis and stop you from drinking during the day.

What I am trying to say is, this video rules. Must have had a premonition we would change our tag-line and decided to epic fail for us.

Here is a stack of old cd's and a half eaten banana.

God I hate bananas.

CRB Virtual Coach: DO IT AGAIN!

Nov 5, 2008

That Looks Fun

One would think a person like Freddy K would have a strict work-out regimen, be studious in his preparation for jumping, and single-minded in his focus to be the sickest jumper out there.

Its not any normal person that puts up stats like this:
Career Highlights:

1. 9 Time World Record Holder
2. Current Men’s Jump Record Holder (243’)
3. Current Night Jump Record Holder (226”)
4. Current Men’s World Jump Champion
5. Elite Ranking #1 for 5 consecutive years
6. 52 professional wins
7. 7 Time US Master’s Champion
8. 5 Time US Open Men’s Jump Champion
9. 7 Time USA Water Ski Athlete of the Year
10. 2006 IWSF Male Water Skier of the Year
11. 4 Time US Team Member (3 Golds)


1. Current World Jump Record (243’)
2. Current Night Jump Record (226’)
3. Former Night Jump Record (224’)
4. Former World Jump Record (240’)
5. Former World Jump Record (238’)
6. Former World Jump Record (236’)
7. Former World Jump Record (233’)
8. Former World Jump Record (226’)
9. Former Ski Fly Record Holder (286’)

Right. So, something like that would make you thing, what a dork, he proably sits at home on friday night and sharpens his fins and spends hours in a wind-tunnel making sure he maintains the proper co-efficient of lift while airborne.


HAHA, sucker! Nope, his life is cooler then ours.

On his website, he has a nifty photo album page, "A Peek Behind the Curtain" and has some fun pictures from Halloween.

You win the CRB award for the day, come to our offices to collect your prizes. One series of tubes, a diet pepsi and a nice deli-tray of smoked meats. Congrats!!!

Something is Different

Hey! We got a new President!! Anyone else hear about that?!?!

The current editor of this site, the ODBF, asked me to wax some opinions here in this space about the election. Why? I am not sure, but, I would venture a guess that its because I am much better with grammar and the English language.

However, after spending an hour or so bashing away on the keyboard I decided that the CRB is not the place for that sort of talk.

However, here are a few thoughts for you guys to chew on.

1) I am amazed at the ground swell of support for both candidates.

2) Obama's meteoric rise is simply astonishing. I remember seeing his win in 2004 in Illinois on TV. He has the IT factor. Opinions aside, he looks like a president.

3) McCain was most likely a sacrifical lamb for the republican party, expect a reorganization of the party and a Palin ticket in 2012 and that will be fun to watch.

4) I expect the next campaign to start in about a year for the 2012 election.

5) Thank god this whole thing is over.

We started this site, in its current incarnation, after the last major election. So, this is our first CRB Politics situation, and as a waterski site, its not our place to go off about anything. We hope everyone voted. If you voted for Obama, well, you won. If you voted for McCain, well, you lost.

Thats about it.

Its over...but we leave you with this.

From a superficial perspective, this is an historic type day in this countries history, from a non-superficial perspective, its not. I think this represents something more social then political, but, goodness, its certainly something that galvanized the majority of this country huh?

I still can't reach the fifth ball on my 28 off set though. Now, That would be a change I could believe in!!!!

Nov 3, 2008

Fitz brings the funny

So in this time of tension and mistrust, Acorn and voter fraud, McCain and Obama, Beer and Pretzles... you get the idea...

Um....What? CRB and politics...F that noise! on with the nonsense!

Fittzy has taught his dog how to kneeboard, now dont give me any PETA bullshit about the dog being mistreated, I mean look at the thing, its having a blast. Of course it is kneeboarding, so if Big Gay Als Big Gay Animal Sanctuary wants to contact the pooch then thats about right...

World record #2

Not only has Freddy broken his own world record again, but Clemintine Luciene has broken the world trick record.

Pass one. I would break a leg, and not in the good way...*
*what exactly does someone mean when they tell someone to "break a leg", how is that a good thing?

Pass two. Not the best camara work, but damn she is good. Quite the recovery on that last flip.

Thanks Joey for pointing out that I forgot the score. Clem put it out there at 8840. Which is about what I score*.

*in a summer.

Nov 2, 2008

Holy Crap

According to the USA Waterski site pimp deluxe Freddy Krueger fricking LAUNCHED this past weekend, launch as in the tune of 247.
U.S. water ski athlete Freddy Krueger set a pending men's world jumping record on Sunday at the McCormick Fall Open at McCormick Lakes in Seffner, Fla. Krueger, 33, jumped 247 feet (75.2 meters) on his third and final attempt of the tournament.
This would best his current world record of 243. Guess he really likes skiing at McCormicks, as that is where his World Record was set as well as the pending 247.

247. Wow. Thats 82 Yards. By way of comparison, I once was able to hit a golf ball that far.