Dec 27, 2006

Smarty Pants


The NCWSA Academic All-Stars

Gaze on in wonder as these wonderful products of higher education make like Stephen Hawking himself on the waters of our wonderful country and in the Classrooms of the prestigious halls of many an institution.
"This year has brought with it a new set of awards. One of these new awards is the NCWSA Academic All-Star Team. This team is intended to honor those skiers that excel not only on the water, but also excel in the classroom.

The following skiers met the tough standards set for academic performance. Qualification is based on cumulative grade point average, and only upperclassmen are eligible. Congratulations to these outstanding representatives of the NCWSA."

Wielding a pen and protractor not unlike a set of jumpers.

NCWSA Academic All-Stars (

Dec 26, 2006

ehh..not bad.

How come every time I come around...

The greatest website name ever, gives us the two things.
  1. One of the sweetest barefoot videos ever.
  2. A geocities layout.
Whats great about this video, is that:
  1. It doesn't make you want to poke your eyes out with dental floss
  2. They are girls that make every guy not named Keith St. Onge and some others look like total chumps.
  3. Makes you wish you had a lake like that
Some cows (Rad Video)

Dec 22, 2006

Merry Christmas Everyone!!!

What up Playa?

Merry Christmas from the folks at the Creaky Rowboat!!

Hope everyone has a happy and festive holiday season and thank you for coming by our little site here over the course of the last seven or so months.

If you like our site, send it to your friends and family, spread the love!!

We try to have fun and keep things relativity light hearted and funny here and if you read various other sites and message boards it seems that many people seem are quick to rip on our sport, bitch about rules and tear people down instead of build them up

However, the majority of people who take part in this sport are awesome people and simply enjoy the camaraderie of skiing, the thrill of the pull and the lifestyle that comes with it.

You guys fall into that realm, because anyone who reads this is awesome.

So, thanks for stopping by. Even though we moved out of the boathouse into our rowboat, we will always have a full cooler of beer and stories to tell.

Enjoy the holidays. See you next year.

Holiday Cheer

A bit premature with the taking a break non-sense. Found a sweet video of barefoot wipeouts. So when you are feeling all fat and sassy from Christmas day cheer, paddle up to the rowboat and watch this. Its 45 or so seconds of cheese metal and wicked wipeouts, bad graphics and a few people who don't really add to the plot.

Special mention for the crash at 9 seconds in. I have never seen anyone crash going over a barefoot jump like that ever.


Dec 18, 2006

St. Onge is Imagining and Achieving.


Not sure why he is featured on their website, seeing as Water Skiing isn't an Olympic sport, but Keith St. Onge, he of the extreme barefoot prowess, is given some prominent love on the US Olympic website.

We are all for as much pub as anyone in the Waterski world can get, and to come off so well, very humble and smart, makes it all the better.

Here is a quick passage from the article that I think is really nice.
"But in 2002, St. Onge, competing in a world competition, should have easily won the overall gold medal. A few small mistakes was all it took, and a heartbroken St. Onge turned to friend Patrick Wehner.

After listening to a dejected St. Onge crying on his shoulder, Wehner handed him a small, laminated card.

“If you can imagine it, you can achieve it. If you can dream it, you can become it.” Those were the words printed on the card.

St. Onge knew these words were true, as he was essentially living his dream, but he had bigger dreams, and he was ready to rise to greatness in the world of barefoot water skiing.

“I brought this card everywhere with me,” St. Onge said. “I always looked at it, always pulled it out, always read it.

“I’m gonna pass it on to the next person that needs it just as much as I needed it back then,” he said."
YO!! The CRB could use some love!!

Thinking about this some more, the Rowboat has been seriously lacking in our love given to Barefooters. That makes us sad.

KSO and Scarpa? Come on, CRB...get with it!!

Keith the Olympian (

Dec 14, 2006

A Very Creaky Xmas - Trick Ski Edition

I am Nicolas Le Forestier, I can waste any wakeboarder around.

Lets play a little game here, sort of a question and answer thing.

Q: Why are Trick Skis easier to find online?
A: No idea.

Q: Thanks for that CRB, well said.
A: Affirmative.

Q: Care to expound?
A: Would love to. But, the answer lies within young grasshopper. Search deep in your soul for the answers that you seek. True enlightenment comes from the acceptance of the unknown swirling winds of the sub-conscious.

Q: Go to hell.
A: Boo-YA.

So, lets the hierarchy of the waterski world, lets assume or guess that the popularity of the different disciplines is as such:
  1. Wakeboard
  2. Collegiate
  3. Slalom
  4. Trick
  5. Barefoot
  6. Jump
  7. Show
  8. Hydro
  9. Ski Race
  10. Knee Board
Now granted, collegiate and show takes into account all these different aspects, but, just an in general. Meaning, you can show ski and slalom but, you aren't really a slalomer, or ski for a collegiate team but not be into jumping.

Anyways, take a look at the rough rankings and that may explain the easier availability of Trick Ski's online vs. Jumpers.

It is our belief that Trick Skiing is going to make a hell of a push towards the top of the waterski world. CRB believes that it combines the wow factor of Wakeboarding while providing a more intricate skill-set that the hard core skiers identify with.

Nothing against the wakeboard world, thats the mighty empire in the waterski world, and with one of our favorites, Dallas Friday, heading up the sport they are going to be strong.

But, there is room to grow for the trick ski people as well, especially if people like Siemers and Le Forestier continue to blow peoples minds!

Plus, from a superficial standpoint, people look better trick skiing then they do jumping or slaloming. For example:

For the guys, Ms. Danyelle Bennett

For the girls Mr. Jimmy Siemers

Jimmy's picture isn't great, but, you get the idea. Jumping you have a helmet on and a big wetsuit and normally have some goofy expression on your face, of course you get that in trick skiing too. But, lets be honest guys, girls look better wearing their trick ski get-up vs. jump stuff. Girls, ditto. Would you rather see Jimmy there wearing what he is wearing or with a wetsuit and helmet and sling?

Just human nature pilgrims, SEX SELLS!! Get your shop on!

Quantum Carbon Trick Ski - $575
Available Online:

Sort of the new guy on the block. Designed and produced, I guess, by Russell Gay. He of the unfortunate last name and owner of the very nifty mini-Overton's type online store, Masterline. Also making ropes and handles and bags and the like. Pretty cool stuff all around actually.
"This ski is 100% carbon fiber layup for a stiff, light and very strong ski. The balsa core is very light but is stronger than foam and offers more resistance to heel and handle dings."
Well, thats good right? No one wants dings. Points for neat look, cool name, easy purchase availability. Points deducted for price (I know, everyone is getting screwed here) and weird symbol, like the guy/girl sticker you see at bathrooms in bars when you can't read anymore and just look for the person wearing pants or a dress. But, in this case its the weird boy symbol.

CRB Ranking: B

Reflex Futif - Unknown
Available Online: Reflex World

This is the ski that Nick Le Forestier skis on. Thats should be good enough for all of us.

This is actually a pretty cool looking ski, but if you look at their website and their other skis available, you know that this was the only one the escaped the hands of some criminally insane graphic designer. I don't know what the fascination is with zebra stripes and what not, but, good god man...even though you are French doesn't give you an excuse for that!!

We kid!! Le Forestier is the man, we love him here, and here is an interesting note on the Furtif.
"The grey finish of the "furtif" is a special paint that allows the best gliding. This paint can be lightly sanded before each event to obtain a perfect mat finish."
Interesting. But, not near as cool as this.
"La couleur grise du "Furtif" est une peinture spéciale pour la glisse. Cette peinture peut être légèrement poncée avant chaque compétition pour obtenir un finish parfait."

Points for cool design, neat name, Le Forestier skis on them and general mystery of being French. Points off for lack of price and weird language on their site!!

CRB Ranking: A

O'Brien HC Trick Ski - $599
Available Online: Performance Ski and Surf

Wow, is that a loud looking ski. It seems that O'Brien is the Wal-Mart of waterskis. Meaning, they are loud and stand out in a crowd. Probably do everything that they are supposed to do, but don't really inspire any love or sense of communion with the company and ski.

That could be entirely crap as far as I know, especially because this ski is one of the most expensive around, with the only one more expensive is the Goode trick.

The green graphics scream late 80's to me.

CRB Ranking: B-

Connelly HC Trick - $539
Available Online: Performance Ski and Surf

Now that is a col looking trick ski. Simple graphics...or, no graphics, just a black top with yellow trim and the company name on the bottom. O'Brien may want to take a look at this ski or the Goode ski and you can see what looks good vs. what looks cheap and silly.

Again, as noted in the jump post, Connelly seems to be the "mass" market ski. They are a pretty safe choice and never really seem to disappointed.

I don't think anyone has ever said anything negative about Connelly skis of any kind, their Slalom skis are pretty good I guess, not as nice as the D3's or Goode or HO's but, solid none the less. Regardless, they seem to do everything right.

Points for nice looking ski, ease of purchase and general confidence in product. Points deducted for...umm...lack of hydrofoil?

CRB Ranking: A

D3 Custom X - $575
Available Online: D3

Turns out the O'Brien and D3 graphics guys had a long night out at the local watering hole, probaly knocked back about 20 Zima's and maybe a few shots of Goldschlager, then met up with a couple of girls wearing leg warmers and ripped sweatshirts falling off the shoulder, they danced for a bit to the soothing sounds of Firehouse and Cinderella then hopped on their scooters for a trip back to the design studio for some after hours.

From their they proceeded to make out in and around and on the desk that has the photoshop open. Must have hit the mouse or something and maybe the warp function and the paint fill icon, and this was the result...for both.

Skis are great though.

Points for solid design and lots of pro people seem to like them, points off for weird, if not uninspired, graphics.

CRB Ranking: B+

Goode Trick Ski - $690
Available Online:

One of the few current models that the CRB has skied on recently, so, the opinion being espoused is very slanted.

But, this is the best trick ski there is. It looks cool, skis amazing and comes from a company where the owner is actually a very talented skier in his own right.

The thing weighs next to nothing, tracks awesome but doesn't feel like you can't turn or get lift off the wake.

Then...there is the price.


That is just amazing. Amazing. There are no other descriptive words to describe it. That is just an astounding price for a 42 inch piece of Carbon.

Points for being the best ski around, cool looks, and admittedly being our favorite ski. Points deducted for insane cost.

CRB Ranking: A-

Thats a tough ranking, I really love that ski and really would love to have one of my own. But, the cost is so outrageous that it simply can't take the top spot in good faith.

There is no way that I would ever pay that much for a trick ski, ever. But, since this is Christmas time, fell free fellow CRB people to send one our way via the UPS.

Final list:
Connelly HC Trick - A
Reflex Furtif - A
Goode Trick Ski - A-
D3 Custom X - B+
Quantum Carbon - B
O'Brien HC - B-

We ended up with a tie between Connelly and Reflex. We need a tie-breaker.


Performance Ski and Surf (
D3 (
Masterline (
Goode (
Reflex (

Dec 13, 2006

A Very Creaky Xmas

Let me just reach into my sac...

This is a busy time of year for everyone, what with Christmas shopping, drinking and picking out the perfect holiday themed sweater to put on your dog. You twisted psycho.

Yeah, laugh it up now you bastard, I know where you sleep!!

Everyone has gone through it before, the disappointed look on your unsuspecting gift receiver as they unwrap your feeble attempt at gift giving. Cross that with the shame you will feel as you watch your supposedly inferior siblings / family members / friends impress one another with their amazingly original and highly intriguing gifts that seem to fit perfect.

You note this of course as your all-wooden connect-4 erector set kit from the QVC lies in a pile on the floor like your cloths on the floor after a night of booze, cigarettes and bar skanks.


Never fear as the CRB is here to save you with some last minute gift ideas for that special waterski type on your list, or for yourself or for your favorite blog host...which is of course, this one.


So, anyways, you find yourself struggling for a last minute gift for that waterski friend and you don't know what or where or how to get that perfect gift. Its simple my friend, a pair of jumpers. New or Used it doesn't matter. What self-respecting skier would look at a pair of jumpers and say, "yea, well, I was really hoping for a blender"

Actually, if your friend said that you would be legally allowed to beat them to death with that jump ski and dump their body....then take their boyfriend/girlfriend our for a nice steak and gratuitous sex.

Cue porn music...bow chica bow wow!!

That never happens though because anyone who is cool enough to be a member of the Creaky Clan already has awesomely cool friends who would never prefer a blender of a pair of jump skis. Even simply for the straight economic aspect. I mean, a new pair of Air Neville's is borderline 3 grand. F-that noise, just sell them and buy about 20 blenders.

So, here is our rundown of jump skis out there that we are aware of, along with availability to purchase and our patented CRB ranking.

D3 Nightmare - $2300
Available online: Performance Ski and Surf

These are pretty cool looking skis, and from everything I have heard pretty awesome to ski on as well. Of special note, Freddy Krueger skis on these and is pretty awesome. So, this would be a fine choice for your waterski friend.

History lesson: most people have at least a cursory attachment to D3, as many people who are over the age of 26 or so were alive and kicking during the Kidder heyday. With Sammy Duvall and Carl Roberge kicking butt and looking badass, as well as bring waterskiing to heights that it hasn't reached since.

But then Kidder went on sabatical and then came back as KD, which is fine and good but not Kidder and then went away again. Dennis Kidder got his Mojo back and is kicking ass now with D3.

Remember when Sammy's 202 foot jump was just SICK! I remember talk that the physics of ever going over 220 were debated and it was determined that no human could ever go farther. Sammy said somewhere or maybe it was urban legend, but, somewhere I remember he would routinly fly another 20 some feet in practice.

Landing 220-225's on 72 inch jumpers. 72 INCHES!!

We all know the story, he went a bit farther, polishing off his amazing career with the world record (220 feet) and retired just before these monster planks made their way to the scene. There were some other guys out there who flew, John Swanson, Bruce Neville, but no one to take the torch that Sammy carried. Maybe its Jimmy Siemers, but right now, in jumping, its Freddy Krueger. D3's big boy, carrying the Dennis Kidder mantle of Jump Dominance forward.

But he isn't what Sammy was, no one is, but no one else has ever been closer.

Points for cool design, cool name, Dennis Kidder, Freddy and world records. Points off for not being Kidder and cost.

CRB Ranking: B+

Stokes Jump Skis - Unknown Price
Available online: N/A

Don't really know much about these at all, matter of fact nothing, other then June Fladborg skis on them and is pretty good. Searching the entire reaches of the web the only mention of these skis anywhere is on her webpage that mentions them as a sponser and gives a link to their site and it goes to one of those stupid squatter sites thats a bunch of crap.

So, points deducted for extreme web confusion and frustration, but bonus points awarded for mystery and having a rad name.

CRB Ranking: B-

Goodman Stiffy Longboards - Unknown Price
Available Online: N/A

This one is the most frustrating for me. These are probably my all time favorite waterskis. I have never skied on them and only seen them in person once, and that was along time ago at a ski school, if the memory serves correct it was the first year or at least beginning stages of this company, the beginning stages of the long board jumping era.

They undeniably the coolest looking skis around. There is alot to be said for not cluttering up or overly graphic-ing a set of planks. Plus, look at the pictures above and even the beat up and worn out pair (taken from look awesome. In fact, I think that they are cooler then the new ones.

Also, this is the company (in my mind anyways) that signified in retrospect the yin-yang world that is pro waterskiing. Making skis that launched people farther then ever, making them stronger and lighter and better looking, but, ultimatly making some of the stars that built the sport fade away to quick and their records seem less impressive. Like Nirvana and Pearl Jam in the early 1990's, but, instead of making Sammy and Carl fade it was Poison and Warrant. So, thats a bad analagy. Sammy and Carl rule, while Poison and Warrant are crappy bands.

So, points deducted again for web frustration and confusion but mega points for cool factor, mystery and having one of the CRB's favorite skiers, Danyelle Bennett, ski on them and for dragging our sport to new heights...for better or worse.

CRB Rank: A

O'Brien Air Neville Pro - $2,999
Available Online: Performance Ski and Surf

The second picture is from the Skifly store and goes to illustrate how uncool the current skis are. This is a shame, because, from what we know at the CRB O'Brien no longer makes shorty skis so this is all they got.

The Performance website says:
"These skis feature aerodynamic Neville tips, hand milled aluminum fins and custom carbon fiber and graphite laminates sandwiching a honeycomb core."
So, they got that going for them, which is nice. I guess. Points for having Neville attached to it and for being, until recent, one of the lone remaining companies to make shorties. Points off for insane cost, lame looks and general "whatever" vibe.

CRB Ranking: C

Connelly LS 300 and HC 300 - $2,899, $2,699 w/ stokes tips and $1,199 for the shorties
Available online: Performance Ski and Surf

What could be considered the lone "Mass" market jump skis. With the sad decline of Kidder/KD and HO not making jumpers anymore and Carbonworx going weird, this is pretty much it if you are looking for jumpers and don't really know where to go.

More specifically, since this is the only company that we know of that makes "normal" size jumpers, odds are you would be looking for a pair of these...the HC 300's. Unless you are a decent to above average jumper and don't show ski and have access to nice jump conditions, then you can look longer and gravitate towards the longer boards.

Not a bad business model really, like General Motors from back in the day. You would start off your life driving a small Chevy, move up to a Buick or Oldsmobile then eventually a Caddy. Same here, you start with a pair of shorties and then get good and move up.

Plus, they are a well known and I guess respected brand, plus its a pretty cool name. Like O'Neil or Goodman or...umm...maybe D3, if that makes sense. HO is a pretty lame name, so is Jobe, and Billabong and Intensity.

Anyways, points for smart business model, pretty neat skis, pretty neat name. Points deducted for expensive shorties....Thats it. Huh. Well, they shouldn't get to comfortable in the shorties market, as I heard that there may be another small company brewing out there in the world.

CRB Ranking: A-

So, after the exhaustive search, here are our final rankings, listed order.
  1. Goodman Stiffy Longboards (A)
  2. Connelly HC 300 and LS 300 (A-)
  3. D3 Nightmare (B+)
  4. Stokes Jumpers (B-)
  5. O'Brien Air Neville Pro (C)
Happy shopping friends, and happy holidays from the Rowboat.

Performance Ski and Surf (
June Fladborg (
Skibay (

Dec 3, 2006

So, a wake 180 really isn't that impressive huh?

Up, Up and Away!

While we anxiously await video or photo proof of Freddy Krueger's world record (pending) its worth noting that Mr. Nicolas Le Forestier himself, while being a disgustingly good trick skiier, isn't afraid to show proof on his own website. This is a youtubed version of his 12,400 point world record run from 2005.

Of note, Le Forestier also has a bunch of other videos of some really cool tricks on his site. Plus some photo goodness of his knee surgery.

Going along with the world record theme of this post, you can look here for a list of current world record holders in the main three event categories, including Skifly.

Pretty impressive stuff. It would be sweet to track down videos from these various runs. If possible.

Pumping in crazy trick ski skill

Here is the list of current world record holders (for those to lazy to click on the link below!). Actually, click here for a very complete list.

IWSF Mens:
Jump: Freddy Krueger (240 feet)
Trick: Nicolas Le Forestier (12,400 Points)
Slalom: Chris Parrish (1.5 at 43 off)
Ski Fly: Jaret Llewellyn (299 feet)

IWSF Women:
Jump: Elena Milakova (186 feet)
Trick: Mandy Nightingale (8,740 Points)
Slalom: Kristi Overton - Johnson (1 at 41 off)
Ski Fly: Elena Milakova (228 Feet)

Jump: Ryan Fitts (193 Feet)
Trick: Jimmy Siemers (6,820 Points)
Slalom: Will Asher (3.5 at 41 off)

NCWSA Women:
Jump: Regina Jaquess (152 Feet)
Trick: Regina Jaquess (4,440 Points)
Slalom: Regina Jaquess (2 at 39.5 off)

Search around and take a look, I can't find Wakeboard records and I don't feel like figuring out how to convert meters to feet for Barefoot. Maybe later on.

Nicolas Le Forestier (
World Records (

Dec 1, 2006

Lakeside Hooters!

Mom, I am really, really, really hungry all of a sudden

On one of Rykerts recent posts, he mused about the reducing the risk of pelvic injury during serious waterski crashes if you piss in your wetsuit.

Or something like that. Look, our man Rykert and his Lake are much smarter about medical stuff then we, we will let him explain what he means. Or, cut and paste.
"While orienting as an orthopedic nurse, I learned this tidbit form an expert on pelvic fractures. Basically, having an empty bladder, at the moment of a pelvic fracture, reduced the chance of internal injury because of the bladder's reduced size in its nondistended state. That means less bladder to hit with a chunk of misplaced pelvis. Less bladder space means less displacement of colon, and other assorted anatomical injury risks when the pelvic cavity isn't crowded by the remnants of your last 7 red bulls. Speaking of colons,the famous PJD is not a bad idea either. Don't be full of crap unless you are bragging about your best distance to the ditzy, yet busty waitress at your nearest lakeside Hooter's."
Lakeside Hooters? Well played!

Then Rykert gets wistful.
"Note: I wish I had the Rowboat's research team working for me. If that were the case, I would have have pictures of someone peeing, empty red bull cans, a jumper, a hooters girl, and a bottle of milk of magnesia to go with my little announcement."
Have at em dude, reasonable rates as well!!

Pictures of Lakeside Hooters coming right up sir!

Not Just for Warmth (

Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...