Oct 31, 2011

Vid Day Monday - Christmas Lights Edition pt 3

Now that Halloween is over, its time to focus our dollars on our next holiday, Christmas, and here is another pretty nifty light show.

Vid Day Monday - Christmas Lights Edition pt 2

And another one.

Whats with random trick or treating nights? I had kids coming to my house all weekend, why cant the cities agree which day trick or treating is and set the same times? I need to move away from the border of two towns.

Vid Day Monday - Christmas Lights Edition pt 1

Its Halloween and you know what that means? Crazy light displays...wait...no that is Christmas...but today is October 31st...

Oct 29, 2011

CRB Brings the Sexy

Its that time of year again, no we do not mean the end of ski season, that was a long time ago for us up here in the arctic, its time for girls to put on lingerie and call it a costume. And for the guys to take pictures and have it not be considered creepy. Ah college girls and their lack of high moral standards, so wonderful.

Oct 28, 2011

Are We Not Talking Enough About Zachk's Jump Question Mark

It is quite possible that we haven't heard about it more or looked in the right places, but, normally, we are fairly average at keeping up with the peoples chatter about waterski events, and, we sort of think that there hasn't been enough made of Zack's record breaking jump from collegiate nationals.

194 feet off a 5, it is so awesome. Zack is one of the skiers we have been able to see in person and dude is good as hell, but, sheesh, the physics of getting that distance at that speed off that jump height is crazy. That jump is a stomp and stands on its on. As waterskiers, sure, we all tend to get bogged down in gossip and nonsense, but, give credit where its due and that jump is bitchin.

As an overall sport, waterskiing, it tends to lead to fractured reporting somewhat in that we don't always know what, where...how, why something is happening.  See our post from earlier about Alex about travel.

Once we finally start getting info, digesting, something else happens that is sanctioned by some other governing body and...its virtually impossible to track down a comprehensive list of scores or know what went on or why x happened while y went on.  Look, its great to hear, "Freddy crushed another one" or "Regina is crazy good", but, we already know that.  Its almost like our sport makes you work extra hard to be a fan.  You wouldn't fire up your computer at work on Monday and see, "Tom Brady won the pan-am football game" and wonder what the hell happened would you?

Anyways, point is, its almost as if this performance has fallen by the wayside, when it should be celebrated.  Hopefully Waterski Magazine or whatever the hell else is out there put this, or Poochies on the cover.  Yo, another article about entry gates in slalom or pre-turn or whatever...probably isn't necessary.

Just give our boy some love, tremendous feats happen on the reg around our sport but, it shouldn't be taken for granted, we are just in such a great time of great skiers that things need to be celebrated more.

Right Bill??

you know Bill is 'feenin' for more info

Look At Those Waves!!

My goodness, at its core surfing is one of the coolest most "in touch with nature" type sports there is...and if you have never had the chance to surf make a bee line to the airplane in your driveway and get out somewhere and experience it.

Like waterskiing, surfing, has people who are so far above in skill then the rest of us that they go out and search for more difficult obstacles, or more challanging environments or something to keep up that rush. Think of...ski fly vs regular jumping, something differnet for more juice.

In the video above, and from what we can gather, you see that the reefs below the waterline are set up in such as way that the waves are thicking...deeper, not higher, but more aggressive and with a more random way in which the waves break.

This, of course, attracts hard core surfers that want to experience this maniacal brand of surfing. They want to experiance a rush and a style of surfing they haven't experianced before that allows them the threat of danger and death while providing the rush of surfing. Think of it in terms we all know, its like...1/3 unprotected sex with a stranger, 1/3 experimental drug use and 1/3 in your own bed. I.e, you know the generalities but your in for something you have never experienced before.

Even if that amazing analagy doesn't work for you, just watch the people wipe out into the waves and look at what is coming behind them, holy lord that is that mean looking. How on earth do these dudes survive?

Well dude, sometimes you eat the bear and sometimes...well...the bear eats you.

Oct 27, 2011

Granola, Tuna and PBJ

Our girl Alex Lauretano wrote a little piece for a blog, Girls for Sport...or G4S, talking about her travel habits, diet and how she tries to keep the proper mindset during her jet setting life.

First of all, lets get one thing straight G4S, you are treading dangerously close to CRB territory, we have allready made an acronym out of our name and that is virgin territory, fresh powder in the blog land if you will, acronym nonsense is our game.

Second, Alex mentions that she has over 69,000 miles flown this year already.  That is god damn insane.  Not to mention a bit juvenile, because 69...lolololol.

Maybe those of us who watch from the sidelines and cheer people and whatever don't quite understand some of the rigors that the real good skiers go through, sure, we all pack up our cars and head out to a weekend tournament to knock out a whirlybird and/or fall on a 28 off pass after shot gunning a beer because someone said we would be a pussy not to or something, but, the real good ones travel alot more then, maybe, we think about.

Now, with this travel thing in mind...Alex mentions that she packs her own food.  Which, on its surface may seem a bit strange, but, it makes sense when you are a globe trotting pro skier AND member of GTF (hard to say GTF and not think DTF...but thats just us) and bringing along some food that you are comfortable with makes sense, shoot....when CRB travels we pack up some Old Crow whiskey and three boxes of cheeze its...and thats just going across state lines.  From her post.
So to say the least, I try to come prepared and travel with food in my suitcase, just in case. Even when traveling in the US or Europe, the food is sometimes just different from what I’m use to and changing my diet up a lot is not something I like to do right before competing. Granola bars, tuna, and peanut butter and jelly supplies haven’t failed me yet!
No mention of coffee and taco cats??  Keanu is going to be so sad.

Keanu, you poop INSIDE the porta potty!
Unfortunately, not much in her piece applies to the majority of the CRB, as it deals with being in shape and having a healthy lifestyle and correct mental out look, and most of us tend to shade towards the chemical enhancement to fix whatever ails us.

btw, check out the picture in the article, its Alex on the platform...like her mastercraft magazine ad, maybe she just likes hanging out in the back of the boat...yo girl, come sit up front or not, no pressure...but we wonder if she wrote this post there as well.  Lets see.

Wifi on the lake is wicked fast

omg omg omg omg omg, the new waterproof macbook pro. Jealous!

**Update - where we don't mess up alex's legs and ss fat guy comes by to check out the situation**

We, for one, welcome our new Trick Jump Overlords

Notice given to all trick jumpers out there, your time is short. Look at this kid, just like 6 years old or something and already smashing it. Just wait until his parents put a ski on his foot and things are over. Double whirlybird to blind? sure, thats a warm up. Triple gainer with grab? Yeah, lets try that out.

You have all had a good run, but, better get what you can now, its over soon

Called It

When Natalia Berdnikava broke the world trick record awhile back I mentioned I used to ski with her when she first came to the US. I also said that the other skiers in our group and I all said we thought she would break the world jump record but never thought about the trick record. Well she has finally done what we all knew she could.

The way she would just explode off the ramp was crazy, it looked like she was trying to do a long dive. Nat has refined her skiing and become one of the top female skiers our sport has ever seen. She has set Trick and Overall world records and can now add a Jump world record to her stable of accomplishments.

Oct 25, 2011

National Anthem - Boosh

Ok now this vid needs to be manditory watching for anyone who ever has a say in who sings our national anthem at sporting events. If the fucking super bowl puts some dip shit like Christina Aqulara up again this year I am going to have to drive down there and bitch slap some people. They have already ruined the half time show...GOD DAMN MADONNA???? ARE YOU SERIOUS???

Also the flyover at the end is bad ass.

Oct 24, 2011

Vid Day Monday

The Police Academy movies were great back in the day. And the coolest part was Micheal Winslow and his insane voice control. Here he is doing Whole Lotta Love by Led Zeppelin. Hella cool!

Vid Day Monday

Lorenzo D'Alberto takes the title for Men's Tricks smoove like butta.

Vid Day Monday

We have focused quite a bit on crashes in the last week, well how about we take a look at the winners instead of the epic fails. First up we have Women's Trick winner Nancy Chardin. Those French produce some bad ass trickers.

Oct 21, 2011

Lake Trout Carry Out - Weekend Edition

Been a fun week in the waterski world, and by extension at CRB HQ.  So fun, in fact, that the pretty Brazilian soccer fan has taken up fandom of the CRB and, apparently, enjoys standing in some field somewhere.

And, dang thats a cool flag.

Note: we did try to chronicle all the places that the Kyle and Tony show video ended up, link, and this little exercise proved to be both exhausting and futile.  Its fascinating to see how something goes "viral" and ends up in various places.  It would be a very interesting if someone or some organization could track things like this, organically.

Not trying to make a "viral" video and track it, but, have something like Kyle's wipeout which people picked up on and track that.  Then again, the more you really explore things on the internet, the more weird places you end up.

Did learn a new use for a broom handle!  So that was nice!

Also, its almost halloween.  Everyone is invited to the CRB halloween party at HQ.  We will have the cooler there and, since we went to sams club last week, a ass ton of cheeze its.

Brief aside, Elmore Leonard, the dude behind the awesome tv show Justified and a bunch of good movies...and the tv show Karen Cisco, which had Carla Gugino is 86 years old.  He is getting divorced.  86 years old and getting divorced.  Thats crazy, hopefully its on account of both him and his wife having crazy affairs with much younger people because that would give us all hope that getting old doesn't mean you can't still be fun and have sex all the time.  Of course, he got married (we think) at 68, so, he made it almost 20 years.  Good work Elmore, go get a taco.

Below are some links to various random articles, some interesting some stupid.  You Decide!!  Hey, lets go out and purchase a small fishing boat with a 25 horsepower motor and drive it!


  • Week two of Waterski Daily, now with a fun theme song (porn based).   (CRB)
  • Live in Rochester, MN?  Good, here are some things to do this weekend!   (Post Bulletin)

  • ULM Won Collegiate Nationals for the 23rd time.  Hey guys, quit warehousing all the trophies!!   (News Star)

  • Seriously, ski racing is g-d insane.  If it please the court, we would like to introduce three articles into evidence, marked 23, 24 and 25, proving this sport is awesome and crazy.  (link 1) (link 2) (link 3)

  • Taylor Woosley, whose parents are Kris Lapointe and Jennifer Leachman, is surprisingly a really good skier.  You have an unfair advantage girl!  (Orlando Sentinel)  Also, nice boots.  (HO Sports)

  • Still don't think that waterskiing or wakeboarding, in its current form, will ever be in the Olympics, but, hey!  ULM won Nationals and here is a USOC page saying so.  (USOC Press Box)

  • Remember our old buddy Steve Locke?  Former head of USA Waterski and guy who spoke with glowing praise of CRB...and also broke our hearts?  Well, he still heads up USA Field Hockey and the women's national team just beat Chile 2-1.  Suck on that Chile!  USA USA USA

  • Jennifer Morrison, is awfully attractive.  Warming glow does not like her new show, but, that hardly matters, Gossip Girl has been on TV for years and its horrible.  (Warming Glow)

  • Drinking and excercise, Olivia Munn is brilliant.  A mensch even!  (Time of India)

  • One of my weaknesses, other then extraordinary love making skills, is that I don't know much about finance, or accounting...honestly, I am pretty bad with money.  Regardless, moving 50 some trillion dollars in derivatives to the depositors side seems like a real bad idea.  (NY Post)

  • Cool swimming pools bro.  Unrelated note: really need a vacation.  To any of these places.  Immediately.  (CNNgo)

Finally!! A view from the other shoreline as Zach kills it...and wow, I could watch this over and over. Its so awesome.  Long time ago at a ski school saw jumping from this angle and have been saying it since, this view is the best.

Minor quibble, don't zoom in on Zach while he is in the air, you lose a bit of sense of speed and flight.  Oh, la de da you ungrateful ass.  You are right, just be thankful.  

Hey!  Lets go have some beer and make poor decisions!!

Oct 20, 2011

Kyle and Tony are Everywhere *update 2*

Kyle Dammeyer is all over the sporting world today, we are going to try and document all the various places, blogs, websites, tv shows, etc that this video shows up.

SI Hot Clicks


Awful Announcing

Sharapova's Thigh

Right This Minute

The Big Lead

Pop n Sport - french site


Welcome To The Big Show - Week 2

**Studio 3 on Lot 4 of Boathouse Networks**

Director: Places everyone...OK, Jeff, Cris...que theme in 3...2...


Cris: Welcome to Waterski Daily on Boathouse Networks, the Daily waterski update show where we smack you in the face with the lake trout of truth.  What what?!?!  Jeff, my other mothered brother lover, what is happening?

Jeff:  Not much, just layin back in the cut, chillin...tryin to get my fade on, ya hurd?


Jeff: *dap*

Cris: *dap*

Jeff: as Ralph Waldo Emerson once said,  Cris, "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." and that speaks volumes because I am full of the Daily Truth and ready to impart the wisdom to the peeps, lets do this.

Cris: /looks at camera 2

Cris: indeed

Cris: It was quite the week on the waterski world stage and people going off!!  Sippin on that lean yo, bring dat correct

Jeff: ...

Cris: ...

Jeff: Right you are Cris, lets set our Magellan type sights on the world of collegiate waterskiing.

*lights dim dramatically*

Oct 19, 2011

Very Early Vid Day Monday

This. Is. Awesome.

And it probably hurt a hell of a lot, but its awesome so Boom!


You win the CRB award for awesome crash this week. Its a new award, we just made it up, but you earned it with flying colors.

We set this vid to post on Monday but it has decided to go all crazy viral and is now on Deadspin, so we are going to post early. Vid Here

And yes Deadspin, college waterskiing is a real sport. Don't make us do the same thing to you that we are doing to ESPN with our #OccupyESPN protests.

Update:  Besides that jump crash being pretty awesome, Tony's annoucning adds a wonderful layer to this cake.

Car Seat Construction = A view on society

A while back while surfing through the channels we came upon this tv show, a simple concept, but, its all about how various things are made.  Its on the science channel and even if you don't have it you can see many of the episodes on netflix or direct from their site here.

What I found fascinating about this particular video is that this company that puts car seats together, receives all their parts on a JIT schedule, meaning, they get their parts right about the time that they put the seats together.

Now, think of the other companies that make those parts, and how they go about their business.

Now, think of the other companies that make the parts to supply those companies who supply the company that make the seats.

Now, think of the companies that supply the parts, to the companies that supply the parts, to the company that supplies the parts to make the seats, which are just parts, which are then supplied to the car company to put together before you even get to see them.

Whats mind boggling about this whole process, is, the immense scope of the entire production system that goes into everything that we use!

Where ever you happen to live, think about all the people that wake up and go to jobs in whatever capacity that they do and whatever their end product is and how that product evolves or becomes part of whatever end product you use.

Its an interesting concept in thought process.

Its really easy to take for granted all the things that we have at the tips of our fingers now days.  Things that ten years ago would have required more work to acquire, it would have been harder to get a mobile cup of coffee in the morning, you actually had to call your friends to see what they were doing, you had to actually follow your ex around to stalk instead of using facebook.

We all tend to get irratated when we can't get a burger and a couple beers in ten minutes for lunch, or, get pissed when the internet goes down for even a couple minutes during the day.

But, if you really stop and think about how much goes into every single thing that we do on a daily basis it would blow your mind!

In the video above, all the parts that come into that seat factory are already put together and the workers there assemble the finished chair.  From the cut foam, to the leather covers, to the heating elements, to the air bags, to the head rests, to the frames, to the recline mechanism....and all those parts came from companies that have other companies that supply them their parts to put those airbags, the electrical systems, the heating elements, the handles together.

To take this one step further, think of all the people that work at each and every company along that supply chain, the design, the management, the accounting, the sales, the material acquisition, the hr, the i.t geeks, the labor...its an endless chain of people all working together in this capacity to make a damn car seat.

If you think of it from the bottom level workiing up, the company that makes the seat brackets, they have to have the molding machines and the raw metal to mold, the people to run the company, etc etc, and ancillary to that company is the company that supplies the machines and services the machines and supplies the raw metal....and on and on and on and on.

I happened to have a job where I spent an awful lot of time looking out the window of my office at a highway that ran by.  Often I would wonder, where are these people going?  What are they doing?  Its 11:30 AM on some random tuesday, not everyone could be going to get a sex toy could they?

Thats the miracle of modern society, everyone has their little space to fill within our world, we all have our little tasks that contribute to the overall well being of the economy.

Side note, in that context of this post, its ironic how the people that we obsess over, the celebrities offer so little in comparison to a middle manager at an office supply company.  Kim Kardashian offers so little value compared to a Michael Scott type.

However, value is also a non-tangible item.  So, my concept of value may or may not jive with yours, maybe Kardashians exploits on a day to day basis provide some entertainment value to someone and instead of killing themselves they laugh at her nonsense and because of that non-suicide this person develops a great lithium ion battery to power to the next generation electric car.  Who knows!

Anyways, we all play our parts.

Mastercraft boats, who have had a bit of a PR hit recently, employ...say...100 people total, I have no idea, but, lets say thats what they employ.

They purchase fiberglass and electronics and engines and transmissions and whatever else goes into building a boat, all those companies that supply their raw materials employ X number of people as well. Moving back up the supply chain, think of all the people that are employed to sell and service and promote and use Mastercraft boats, and from there, all the other companies, the gas companies and the parks and the launch permits and the various ski/wetsuit/rope companies and all of that.

One mistake or apocalyptic issue within that finely tuned pipeline and it ruins your shit!

Lets say for example, Clarion stereos (or whatever Mastercraft uses for stereos) has a shipment of marine grade stereos and pre-amp outs on the receivers are bad or the screens don't work or whatever and Mastercraft cant make deliveries on time.

Shit is messed up!!!!!

You know how when you are walking in a big crowd, like...filing into a football game or going into a bar or a mexican cockfight and someone ahead of you stops all of a sudden to tie their shoe and you all go nuts to butts in line?  You all bonk into each other like, "WTF man?"

Thats what the process is.  We are all a million different mice doing our little part to make the larger dynamic go smooth, once one of us decided thats we need to tie our shoe, we all start smushing our peckers into other peoples butts.  Thats science!

Its an absolute miracle that society doesn't just crumble down around our ears while we get drunk and listen to our ipods, but, we are such a fluid society that it will never happen.

We live in such an awesome world, an amazing time and place where things are right there for the taking, everything at our fingertips and I wonder sometimes if we don't appreciate what we have in the moment.

Its just an amazing concept if you think about it, every single thing that we all do every single day is influenced by millions of other people and still we all tend to think that everything revolves around us.

Well of course we do, its dumb to think otherwise, of course your own life revolves around you, who else would it revolve around, my mom?  Thats idiotic, but, that isn't the point.

We all live in such an awesome time and place and some how through time and through tribulation we have come upon the culture that we are in now where things seem to move along smoothly, like everything is lubricated with motor oil, we all slide together and we don't have any real issues.

Thats why the car seat thing is so interesting, or for that matter, why the production of anything is so intersting if you actually think about everything that went into that seat getting into your car or that tomato getting onto your delicious BLT or those barleys getting into your delicious beer or or that little microphone getting onto that delicious weather lady on the news right now.

Furthermore, what is intersting about this is that this concept is not soley for the production aspect of life either, anyone who knows or is a social worker type or a teacher type, has kids who are different or affected by their social world more then others and that affects their daily life.

Their, the kids, output, their throughput is adversly affected by their supply chain.  Their dad kicks their ass on the daily, or they live in a bad environment or they are spoiled ass brats who are overly entitled to things.

Its all the same.

Proper supply chain management is what makes this country go.  From raw metal and finished heating elements to healthy neighborhoods and proper accountability for parents and children.

It all works together...the spokes of every aspect of our lives affect so much around us that when you sit back and look at it, it sort of blows your mind.

This is why, you can't pass judgment all the time on assholes that you deal with in life and can't always bitch about crappy things that you get as a consumer.  So much more goes into the construction of a product or a life then you are aware of, or that I am aware of, that it pays sometimes to take a step back and go, WHOA! things are amazing!!

Then, of course, that step back caused the guy behind you to spill his coffee and he will probably want to kick your ass.

Oct 18, 2011

Quit Staring At Me!

In this world of Photoshop and online scams, it pays to have a hearty dose of skepticism at reports of something strange — including an albino fetal shark with one eye smack in the middle of its nose like a Cyclops. 
But the Cyclops shark, sliced from the belly of a pregnant mama dusky shark caught by a commercial fisherman in the Gulf of California earlier this summer, is by all reports the real thing. Shark researchers have examined the preserved creature and found that its single eye is made of functional optical tissue, they said last week. It's unlikely, however, that the malformed creature would have survived outside the womb. 
"This is extremely rare," shark expert Felipe Galvan Magana of Mexico's Centro Interdisciplinario de Ciencias del Mar told the Pisces Fleet Sportfishing blog in July. "As far as I know, less than 50 examples of an abnormality like this have been recorded."

This is simply another and mounting piece of evidence of the coming animal uprising. Sharks are becoming one-eyed albino killing machines and probably working with the jelly fish and other sea creatures and they will all get together and kill us all as we are skiing.

So, next time you are out wake surfing and you are swallowed whole, you will know why.


Darin Shapiro was a solid three eventer and then he jumped ship to the wakeboarding world and dominated for years. And then...wait...this was on ESPN?

WTF ESPN?...or actually WTF national TV Stations?

The CRB has a plan to get back on TV we call it #OccupyESPN. We will use this method to get our 1% sport back in front of the 99% we don't give a shit about...or something like that. Everyone just go to the ESPN offices with your skis and $400,000 RVs and lets show the world that water skiers deserve to have their voice heard. We have been marginalized for way to long, also, we don't want to work at getting back on TV, just put us on there because we deserve this. And the banks need to forgive my boat loan. And the government needs to build a ski lake near my house. And wind...wtf? Seriously, its time for water skiers to stand up for their rights!

Cut Later!

Rykert's Lake of Sin beat us to the punch with this vid. It is such an awesome jump that we had to steal it. So here you go!

Oct 17, 2011

Vid Day Monday

Not only did the Men's Collegiate Jump record fall this last weekend but so did the Women's. Lauren Morgan topped Alex Lauretano's 155 foot boot from last years South Central Regionals. Poochie is part of a the new wave of very talented Women's jumpers calling themselves "Girls That Fly" and she showed she certainly does with this boot.

We may not have had vid of Zack's jump but we do have Lauren's. Boosh

Vid Day Monday

Zack Worden took down a record that many thought was unbreakable. Ryan Fitts jumped 193 off a 5 foot ramp at 32 mph in 1999. This record was set before the "Bebee era" of driving was ended and many argued it was an unbeatable distance due to the drivers helping the skiers. We are not saying Fitts record is not legit, that is just an argument for why his record held for so long. We think it held cuz Fitts' crazy late cutting jumping style is such a great fit for college jump speed.

Well that record is no longer the longest NCWSA jump, Zack Worden went out and topped it with a 194 foot bomb. We can only find the vid on facebook so the jump vid is HERE.

Here is Zack practacing about a month ago at ULM's practice site.

Vid Day Monday

Crazy good Frisbee skills. Way better then those annoying ass hippies that played in the lot behind my house in college. Yes I still want to kill them.

Oct 13, 2011

Predicting 2011 Collegiate Nationals pt 3

Sitting here in my office watching the Nationals webcast means absolutely nothing I get paid to do will get done today. Only way this could be better is if I had gotten off my ass and gone down to Bennetts to watch. There are few sites out there as nice or set up as well for a tournament like the NCWSA Nationals. On to Day 3 with Women's Tricks and Men's Jump and the final scores.

Women's Tricks
ULM's women have fallen to FSC in Jump and Slalom, but they will claim the last Women's event of the weekend. In a tight fight for the top 4 positions ULM will edge out Alabama while ULL and Rollins will round out the top 4. FSCs weakness in tricks trops them into 5th with ASU hot on their heels. Cincinnati, San Louis Obisbo and La Crosse have the ability to knock ASU down if they slip up.

ULM 2000
ALA 1935
ULL 1860
ROL 1830
FSC 1490
ASU 1340
CIN 1175
SLO 1135
LAX 1070
OHS 740
UCD 610
TAM 505

After 5 events, with only the jump event to go...

/drum roll

ULM 9865
ULL 9265
FSC 9175
ALA 8815
ROL 7965
ASU 7760
SLO 4935
LAX 4395
OHS 4290
CIN 4150
TAM 3745
UCD 3280

And finally, the final event of the weekend is Men's Jump. This event is intense as the results here can give you a nudge up or down a spot, or can win you nationals...or cost you that big trophy. If the first 5 events go as we think, ULM could have 5 guys jump 90 feet and still win the tournament. But that is not going to happen, instead they are going to have 5 guys jump over 140, 1 guy pushing or over 180. So yes, ULM takes men's jump. Their jump team is so dominant in fact they are going to beat their closest competitor by 200 points. FSC who have been chasing ULM all weekend will take a solid second place with the Tide coming in comfortably in 3rd. Rollins, ASU and ULL will battle it out for 4th with all three teams being very closely matched...or not...ULL only put up 3 jumpers this year..wtf? We may be incorrect about this but it looks like they are skiing short a score. If ULL fields a 4th they will bump up in to competition with FSC and Bama. Ohio State has by far the best jump team of the rest.

ULM 2005
FSC 1795
ALA 1600
ROL 1415
ASU 1410
ULL 1390
OHS 1030
CIN 810
LAX 725
TAM 660
UCD 585
SLO 215

Final Score
ULM just did not put it together last year to win their 914th nationals, but this year they brought the heat and will be adding to their shed of trophies. Seriously, their trophies are all in a shed by their ski site.

ULM 11870
FSC 10970
ULL 10655
ALA 10415
ROL 9380
ASU 9170
OHS 5320
LAX 5150
SLO 5120
CIN 4960
TAM 4405
UCD 3865

Oct 12, 2011

Predicting 2011 Collegiate Nationals pt 2

Day 2 of the NCWSA Nationals brings up Men's trick and Women's Jump.

Men's Tricks
All of the talk before the season began was about how dominating the 'Bama trick team was going to be, but with the lack of consistency we are going to make a pick that may not be popular with some people, but the CRB is going to give the gold to ULM. Alabama may have 5 skiers that could ski for any team in the country but they have not put together 4 scores at a single tournament while ULM has. It will be very close though, and ULL could very easily slip into the top spot. Men's Tricks is by far the biggest toss up of any of the events this weekend. ASU could slide in if the teams ahead have an unfortunate fall. FSC and THE Ohio State will battle it out to fill out the 5th spot.

ULM 1930
ALA 1870
ULL 1795
ASU 1760
FSC 1585
OHS 1410
ROL 1205
CIN 1075
LAX 920
TAM 680
UCD 575
SLO 530

Women's Jump
This event shows ULM's Achilles heel, while they will put up 5 respectable scores, at least 3 over 100 feet that will not cut it with this level of competition and will cause them to drop to 3rd if not 4th place. ULL has not been able to top their instate rivals will power past for a solid 2nd. FSC rises to the top again and secures their second event gold. Alabama is right on ULM's heals and could very easily overtake them for 3rd. ASU, Rollins and UC San Louis Obisbo will fight it out for 5th.

FSC 1940
ULL 1855
ULM 1690
ALA 1675
ASU 1405
ROL 1315
SLO 1145
LAX 885
OHS 755
CIN 690
TAM 610
UCD 570

For a list of the school abbreviations click here

Predicted standing after Men's Slalom and Tricks and Women's Slalom and Jump
ULM 7865
FSC 7685
ULL 7340
ALA 6990
ASU 6385
ROL 6135
SLO 3800
OHS 3550
LAX 3325
TAM 3240
CIN 2975
UCD 2670

We ran hundreds of scores, made spreadsheets, consulted those in the know and used the magic 8 ball to get our results. I provide my insight before each list of placements based on our calculations. There is plenty of room for teams to go up and down based on the fact that these teams are now skiing at the same sight with the same conditions and some teams will have skiers that missed a tournament here or there. Midwest teams will most likely place higher then our calculations project due to awful weather at their regional this year.

Predicting 2011 Collegiate Nationals Pt. 1

Collegiate Nationals is upon us and this year we have decided to try a scientific approach to see what the final scores may be.  Today the final top 20 list came out on NCWSA.com and we came at this from a more scientific approach. There is no reason to run the tournament now, here are the winners.

On to the Big show. We are only doing D-1, not because we did not try to do D-2 as well but scoring an entire tournament is a bit more difficult that you would think.

Here is our methodology in determining these scores, we used the various teams placements at their regional events and extrapolated out these scores into Nationals.  Now, obviously, this assumes that each skier skis the same as they did and other factors are basically ignored.  But, the concept was to simply take the teams and sort of rank them by their past performances to determine their future.

Unlike baseball or football where there are advanced metrics to help, including park factor and vorp and what not, waterskiing doesn't have anything like that, obviously.   But, here is our crack at it.

Included is also some opinion to help flesh out the story.

Teams list
CIN Cincinatti
LAX La Crosse
OHS Ohio State
UCD UC Davis
SLO Cal Poly San Luis Obisbo
ASU Arizona State Univirsity
ALA Alabama
ROL Rollins
FSC Florida Southern College
TAM Texas A&M
ULL UL Lafayette
ULM UL Monroe

Day One

Mens Slalom

ULM is very good this year and you can expect to see all 5 of their men run into 38 off.  As you can see from the scores listed below, they nab first place with 2265. We think that second will also be a lock with FSC grabbing silver. Interesting to note that despite FSC being very strong slalom team, they are second to ULM, but, those two teams seem to be in a tier all by themselves with ULL being a shade more then 300 points back in third. The fight for slalom will be 3rd to 7th and then the rest of the pack fighting for the rest of the spots.

ULM 2265
FSC 2100
ULL 1790
ASU 1690
ROL 1665
ALA 1655
TAM 1020
SLO 1010
OHS 910
UCD 830
LAX 730
CIN 570

Womens Slalom

The script is flipped in the women's bracket with our projections showing FSC taking over the top spot with ULM coming in third.  However, in this case the gulf between the one and two teams and the rest is narrowed with Rollins and ULL rounding out the top four and all within 200 points of each other.

FSC 2060
ULM 1980
ROL 1950
ULL 1890
ALA 1790
ASU 1530
SLO 1115
TAM 930
LAX 790
CIN 640
UCD 615
OHS 555

This will conclude day one, and so, based on our projections, this could be the standings

ULM 4265
FSC 4160
ULL 3680
ROL 3615
ALA 3445
ASU 3220
SLO 2125
TAM 1950
UCD 1525
LAX 1520
OHS 1385
CIN 1210

Coming soon will be Day 2 with Men's Tricks and Women's Jump.

If you have differing opinions or people to watch for or anything that could change our predictions let us know!

Oct 10, 2011

Vid Day Monday

This vid terrified me. This trail looks scary enough on its own, but with big holes in the walk way and the fact the guy does not clip into the safety lines at all just proves that he is a much braver and stupider man then I am.

Vid Day Monday

This is a cool view from the top of a pyramid, looks kinda freaky up there. Being the guy in these things is way easier, just stand there and bitch about how heavy it is. Way to many ropes and skis to hit if you fall.

Vid Day Monday

On a scale of 1 to 10 of awesomness this is a 250 foot jump. This may be the greatest rant in the history of the world. All I can say is 'Fuck' and 'Yes'.

Vid Day Monday

Proof that Jaret is a bad ass. He crashes hard, gets up in obvious pain and waves to the crowd, then at the awards he sprays a small bottle of champagne on the winners. Its hard to beat a good jump set by Jaret, he was the cats pajamas of jumping for many years. He went 299 feet off the ski fly ramp! That is hella baller!

And speaking of jumping crashes... Why snow skiing? Well we put the CRB ski masterbu into storage for the year today and thus it is snow skiing time. I am going to cry for the next 7 months.

Vid Day Monday

I have talked quite a bit about cable parks and how I see them as a large part of the future of water sports. So far only in Europe have a large number of 3 event skiers taken to cable skiing. The IWSF is throwing its weight behind cable wakeboarding for the Olympics. Will it get in? Maybe, and sure I tear on wakeboarding, but that is because of the D-bag aspects of the sport, not because we do not respect the skills involved. And you can be damn sure we would watch it on whatever crappy station NBC would relegate it to.

This vid is not cable wakeboarding...so the previous paragraph is pointless, much like most of what I post. This is cable wake skating but its sweet so watch.

2011 Rockstar Energy Drink Byerly Toe Jam: Cable Finals from Byerly Toe Jam on Vimeo.

Oct 7, 2011

Lake Trout Carry Out

Women's world records had been pretty stagnent for many years and just in the last few years those records have fallen left and right. Clem, Regina, and Natty have been wrecking things left and right.

This is the correct way to break news to a man.
Sexy Lady: Honey I killed the car and ran over our children.
Man: Oh its ok honey, come here lets go to the bedroom and make more kids.

This guy has one arm and is a better wakeboarder then 99% of the D-bags out there tearing up my lake when I am trying to ski.

I hate seeing people jumping right away to blaming skiers for tearing up shorelines. Wind waves can be much worse, so can the weekend wallys racing around in their Bayliners and Glastrons.

Hank Longo set a new mens 6 jump record recently. But is it really jumping out of someones shadow if they are injured? Kinda just taking advantage of not having your top competitor around.

LegoLand bought Cypress Gardens after it closed down a couple years ago. It is opening up this next week again and thankfully they have kept the iconic ski shows as part of the park. Here is another vid of the show practice, not much real skiing here.

Cable park built in a neigborhood where living there gets you rights to use the park. Now that is a cool idea.

South American countries often have much more lax laws regulating what TV shows can show you, but in Argentinas version of Dancing With the Stars it seems there are no rules at all. Naked dancing...Yes Please!

Oct 6, 2011

R.I.P. Steve Jobs

There are a few macs, an IPad or two, and about 97 IPhones laying around the CRB headquarters, none of these devices would be possible with out Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs and Apple changed the world of electronics and thus changed how many of us interact with each other in this world. Google, Microsoft and others are just following his lead and it was a very smart path for those companies to follow.

I have a friend that is writing graduate school application essays right now and Steve Jobs' comment about connecting dots backwards and not forwards really hits home for those type of essays. Grad school applications ask questions like "how will you make ABC college better", and you look at it and think "damned if I know". How do you talk about yourself when you don't know what the community at that university is like. We all live in our own bubbles that insulate us from 'the real world'. We are waterskiers and one of our bubbles is the small and mostly upper middle and upper class bubble. That waterski bubble bumps into our high school/college/work bubble now and then but normally there is little real interaction. (an exception is those that pick a school based on the fact it has a waterski team) Our ski bubble is just one dot in our life of connect the dots (bubbles), that dot connects to our family dot which connects to all the other dots that build our lives.

Oct 4, 2011

Welcome To The Big Show

**Studio 3 on Lot 4 of Boathouse Networks**

Director: Places everyone...OK, Jeff, Cris...You guys are live in 3...2...

Cris: You are LIVE and welcome to Waterski Daily where Jeff and I douse you with all the waterski news of the day, what is good my neighbor??!??

Jeff: and a good day to you to you to friend-o, famous Greek philosopher Hypatia once said, "Life is an unfoldment, and the further we travel the more truth we can comprehend. To understand the things that are at our door is the best preparation for understanding those that lie beyond" and that is our goal on the Daily, give you the truth.

Cris: Right on man, dropping the education on us today I see.

Cris: /looks at camera 2

Cris: First up on our space log for today is Regina Jaquess, who, reports are saying broke the womens slalom world record running two buoys at 41 off this past weekend in a top secret location and only now are reports leaking out about this tremendous feat.

Oct 3, 2011

Vid Day Monday - Sexy Edition

Shakira is awesome.  Its a controversial viewpoint to take and we know that there will be alot of angry tweeting and possibly protests, but, we are strong in our convictions and will stand behind this opinion with all of our might.

With that in mind here is a bit of our propaganda, and hour and half of Shakira's sexy melting your damn computer to the ground.  Just so you are aware, Shakira is closer to 35 then she is to 25.  Do with that info what you will.

If this video isn't enough, Shakira will hump your speaker until you come around to our point of view.

If that isn't enough for you, Shakira has brought some friends...

Diesel Ski Boats Question Mark

Sweet stack bro!
Boats run on gas.  To ski you need your boat running. The more you ski the more you need your boat to run, which, means you have to have more gas.

This means, its expensive to ski if you like to ski behind a boat that is running.  Science!

One of the less expensive / efficient options that one could presumably use to power a boat instead of regular gas would be the Mr. Fusion from Back to the Future, but, that technology may be a few years away yet from making it a practical application at your moms house.

However, another possibly viable solution would be utilizing diesel engines in regular ski boats.

Now, an inherent issue with a diesel motor is the somewhat limited rev range and ski boats don't tend to utlize gears.

SO!  This makes applying a diesel motor to a regular ski boat a tough task.  This does not mean that it won't and or couldn't be a solution in the future, and if you have driven a new diesel car, like a BMW or VW, you know that these are bad ass vehicles with hella torque, are quiet and drive awesome.

Maybe Mercury Marine is thinking along these lines by adding some diesel action.  Please explain further mr. blockquote, from trade only today.

Mercury Marine announced it will assume future responsibility for worldwide sales, service, distribution and support of the Cummins MerCruiser Diesel range of high-speed diesel marine engine systems (less than five-liter displacement), including the TDI/SDI ranges of Volkswagen engines.  
The transition of responsibilities from CMD to Mercury Marine has begun and is anticipated to continue into next year, the company said.  
“This move enables us to leverage Mercury’s extensive global sales, service and distribution channels to more effectively serve our customers,” Mercury Marine president Mark Schwabero said in a statement. “We look forward to continuing our relationship with Cummins.”
Sure, we are just hoping and/or speculating that this technology makes it way into ski boats, if for no other reason then it maybe will inspire all those who have routed the big semi smoke stacks through the bed of their trucks to buy a ski boat.

That would be fantastic, two big smokes stacks sticking up out of where the rear seat in the boat should be shooting huge plumes of black smoke up while Eddie in his sweet cut off jean shorts is tearing it up on the skurfer.

"Squeal like a pig as I do this whirlybird, boy" He was heard saying before bitching about his smokes getting wet.

Vid Day Monday - World Record

Word out of Florida is that Regina ran 2 at 41 off this weekend. The more I think about it the less I care about slalom records. Sure its cool to say you are the best there is, but every single lake skis different, drivers are different, conditions...etc etc. Running a record in a cash prize event with a large crowd is more impressive then running it at your own private ski heaven.

Now with that said, 2 at 41 off is bad ass, so a big congrats there! Watch how easy this 39 off looks, she is an hour early for each bouy, looks like a 32 off run not a 39.

And boosh 2 like a boss.

Vid Day Monday

We were having a deep philosophical discussion about the 90s at the CRB world headquarters a few days ago. It seems most people think the 90s were some terrible decade. F that noize! Sure their are about 3 decent songs that came out of the decade, our countries moral compass swung in funny directions seemingly at random, we had mostly awful hair cuts and we liked to wear clashing neon colors. Or was that the 80s...Hell we don't know, figure it out yourself. So yea...I guess the 90s sucked, you win.

Business in the front, PARTY IN THE BACK BITCHEZ!

Other stuff happened in the 90s as well, but we were busy skiing and doing other fun stuff like not having jobs and not having such readily accessible porn.

Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...