Only one thing in the world could've dragged me away from the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window.
Is that even possible? How could the future be now, would that not be the present? Maybe there is some sort of double future that we are not aware of and only D3 knows about.
Every good thing has to come to an end eventually. Whether its a good day on the water, a relationship or even your favorite book/porn magazine. 
Welcome boys and girls to the tourism arm of the CRB empire. Yes, we are now officially endorsing Brazil as the vacation destination of all of our highly High readers and admirers.
Thankfully, after about two years of the CRB we have totally made so much damn money that we are thinking about upgrading our current tow vehicle.
It starts innocently enough, you meet at a bar and share a flirty smile, then you maybe share a tasty cocktail or whatever, and you play the cat and mouse game for awhile hoping that the other person gives you some sign that they dig you.
Posted below is the lost article that was written by a CRB Minion. It was/is supposed to be published in one of the fine student newspapers at the University of Wisconsin at Milwaukee, or, "not Madison" for short. Enjoy.
The fine folks at the ncwsa have a job posting listed on their website for a web dude, which naturally leads us at the CRB to think to ourselves, who would be the best for that job?
Because he is freaking awesome at skiing, Jaret Llewellyn was named male skier of the year by Water Ski and Wakeboard Canada (eh?)!!"This was a crucial year in determining whether I would pursue my career," said Llewellyn, 37, who completed his 24th season on the national team."Oh really? You are now just considering this as a career? Damn fine hobby then Mr. Llewellyn!!
Really, what else could have possibly went on? What? Good skiing? sure, but we get that everywhere. Sex, Drugs, etc...sure...why not. however, we don't normally see trick skiers hit jump ramps. 
To those of you with even a rudimentary understanding of the history of Show Skiing, or simply waterskiing for that matter, certainly know the name Dick Pope Jr.Dick Pope Jr., the son of the founders of Cypress Gardens and who is credited with helping to popularize water skiing, died Thursday night. He was 77. Pope died from pancreatic cancer at about 10 p.m. at his home in Winter Haven, Fla.Also linked from the Usa waterski post is a neat biography that was written about him for his introduction into the waterski hall of fame. Of note is this line:
Although he liked slalom and jumping better than tricks, he perfected several ramp tricks and introduced the 540 turn on the rap in 1952 in his last tournament before joining the Marine Corps.Really? A 540 on the ramp in 1952...and then joined the Marines? Damn this guy was good!
We are guessing that this is similar to the Mr. October stuff in baseball, but, the USAWaterski peeps unveiled, unleashed, whatever, their October Athletes of the month, Danyelle Bennett and Ian Trapp.October is the tenth month of the year in the Gregorian Calendar and one of seven Gregorian months with a length of 31 days. In the northern hemisphere, October is commonly associated with the season of autumn. October begins in western tropical astrology with the sun in the sign of Libra and ends in the sign of Scorpio. Astronomically speaking, the sun actually begins in the constellation of Virgo and ends in the constellation of Libra.Well, OK!!
In Latin, octo means "eight," reflecting the fact that October was the eighth month in the Roman calendar.
So, if you are looking for some sort of smart-ass like recap of Nationals, you have come to the right place. However, the carrier pigeon that normally carries our info to your computer is running late.
The trick ski event is done at Nationals. No biggy right? Running order as such:
Hey, it says so right in the title of the post!!"Well NCWSA will do it's best to bring you action all day. Check here in the news section for play by play and also check the results section of our Nationals page for updated score books."Oh.
The image you see on the right is the snack bar at the Orlando Watersports Complex.Hamburger with lettuce, tomato, onions, pickle $3.50Hook Us UP!!!!
Cheeseburger with lettuce, tomato, onions, pickle $4.00
Hot Dog $2.50
6 Chicken Wings HOT!!! or BBQ $3.50
Turkey or Ham Sub with cheese, lettuce, tomato, onions, pickles $4.75
Pizza pocket $2.75
Ham and Cheese Pocket $2.75
Chicken Cordon Bleu $3.50
Chef Salad $5.00
Garden Salad $4.25
Pizza Slice - pepperoni or cheese $2.75
Half pizza - pepperoni or cheese $8.50
Whole pizza - pepperoni or cheese $15.75
Popcorn $2.50
Fries $2.50
Pretzel $2.50
Onion Rings $3.50
Chips $1.50
Candy $1.50
Cookies chocolate chunk or white chocolate macadamia $1.50
Soda or Bottled Water $1.50
Gatorade or Energy Drink $2.00
In an effort to help out of fellow skiers, and hopefully, loyal CRBer, we post the following "Wanted" Ad.Dearest contact Chevette,
I was hoping you would be able to help me. It was just recently that I relized I had such a problem. This problem has been plaguing me for many years now and I didn't even know it. It seems to me that with your great grasp of the interpornodirectorynet you might me able to help me. I don't own a boat. This is a big problem. Seeing as I know close to nothing about boats or what a good price would be I need help. I don't want to pay a whole lot but I would really like a ski boat. Something that I could possibly sell in a few years without losing my ass. Less than $20,000 would be a must and even less than that would be even better. Let me know if you can be of assistance.
I love you.
Frank
Anyone here get Waterski Magazine?"Twin-tipped water skis designed to be ridden wake to wake, rails and winch Wakeboard based shape Compression molded construction for stiffness and durability Polyurethane core 100% fiberglass wrap Category-first 3D bottom contours Category-first kick tips Goemetric top contours for reduced weight and maximum torsional stiffness True twin-tip shape for perfect switch takeoffs and landings All HO Waterski bindings mount direct to Wakeskis."Yeah, what they said!
"Locke served as the chief executive officer for USA Triathlon for 12 years between 1991 and 2004. He led growth initiatives that increased membership from 9,000 to 53,000; grew the organization from an annual budget of $300,000 to $6 million; initiated new sponsorship relationships resulting in millions of dollars of budget relief over a 12-year span; and created a reserve fund of $2 million through generated profits."Nifty!!
“It is a huge privilege for me to become involved with USA Water Ski,” said Locke, who also has served on the board of directors for the United States Olympic Committee (1996-2004) and as president of USA Taekwondo (2004-2006). “Through my involvement with Olympic and Pan American sports, luminaries such as Tony Baggiano and Steve McDermeit kept me up to date with the pulsating action of all the diverse disciplines of USA Water Ski. Their enthusiasm along with everyone else I have met has me enthused about going to work for USA Water Ski and growing the sport of water skiing across all nine sport disciplines. It should be a lot of fun.”Thats not all though!
"Inbreeding" creates weakness within an organization. Witness that any animal or plant species with a limited gene pool becomes weaker over time and may eventually disappear. The similarity in goverance is strikingly the same. If a sport's governance is "purebred" within the sport, it tends to weaken as little fresh thought is introduced from the outside, and the business side frequently does not flourish. This has been evidenced time and again within NGB governance. The model is just wrong for these times of a needed higher grade of business sophistication."Well, thats pretty good. Welcome aboard dude.
Serious, is there a better name out there then Storm Selsor? We can't decide if thats a great porn name or that of your local weather dude with the doppler 5000 mega-graphing technology, but, either way, this dude can freaking ski.
From the NCWSA website comes this little ditty about the Eastern Regionals and Florida Southern being disqualified due to an ineligible skier."Following Florida Southern Colleges disqualification from Regionals due to sking an ineligble skier the following is the revised scorebook. The Alabama Crimson Tide are now your 2007 Regional Champions."Woo Hoo! Roll Tide, we guess.
As a NCWSA Board member, I'd like to try and add a little insight to this conversation and clarify a few points in this thread. I think Mich skier hit our goal as an organization pretty much right on the head in his above post.
Also I'd like to preface this by saying I was not at the Eastern Regionals. I can only comment on what has been sent to me. Saying that, I think the Eastern Region representatives made the right decision when they DQ'd FSC for an NCWSA rules violation. FSC did make an appeal to the NCWSA Board. It was given very careful consideration and discussion before the ultimate decision to deny it was made. The Eastern Region did allow them to compete without having their eligibility letter on site at tournament registration, something we would not have done here in the west. While a copy of it was emailed during the day Saturday, it was unrealistic to expect it could be read immediately at a lake with no internet access by board members who were working as officials. While I believe that no attempt was made to cover the fact that their skier was ineligible and that it was an honest mistake, it would have been caught had the letter been turned in on time for that event, and an email does not constitute an eligibility letter per our rules.
The board did conduct a thorough review of their appeal, and everyone feels bad about these skiers not participating in Nationals. Contrary to what others have posted, the University involved had nothing to do whatsoever with our decision. I did not care at all which school was involved. While we are not an NCAA sport, the NCWSA strives to maintain our reputation as a legitimate collegiate sports organization, and the integrity of our rules and desire to promote an equitable playing field for all teams. In fairness to the 65 programs or so nationwide that did follow the rules, we could not allow the team that did not to go to Nationals, regardless if it was intentional or not.
I sincerely hope that this does not hurt the FSC program long term, as they do have a strong history in the NCWSA and I hope to see them rebound from this in 2008. I sympathize with the rest of the team who feels they are being punished, but compare it to the NCAA, where a violation can cause future postseason suspension and loss of scholarships that damages programs long term.
I hope everyone realizes that there was no agenda to punish an elite team, or a Florida team, or some of the other misconceptions I've seen on this thread. I wish we had the ability to set up the appeals process and have the staff positions available in the NCAA, but the reality is this is a volunteer board that gives every appeal and voting issue fair consideration and ultimately has done it's best to make decisions that are fair to all programs. Each region elects a board of directors annually, and the NCWSA has created many new committees in the last year to try and give teams greater opportunity to participate in and help run this sport. I encourage anyone who does not like the decisions being made or feels they can help benefit the sport to get involved.
Congratulations to the 15 programs qualified for Nationals and the 5 more from the west that will be decided next weekend.
Sincerely,
Harley Wallace
NCWSA Western Director, NCWSA Vice Chairman
If you click over to the US Olympic Committee site you will catch a little post, well, actually not quite that little post about Freddy and Karen being named water ski athletes of the month.
In an effort to help out of fellow skiers, and hopefully, loyal CRBer, we post the following "Wanted" Ad.WANTED.......80-82' Jump skis in good condition. Goodman or Connelly preferrered but would consider others.
Contact Jimmy at jmillsendo@bellsouth.net
Wouldn't you know it? The CRB returns from our hiatus and order is restored to the world."To come back here and win today was absolutely incredible, especially after the accident last year," said a visibly elated Friday following her win, which bagged her USD$8,000. "It's great to be back in Singapore, and it definitely means a lot to me to claim back the title this year."Dallas knocked off fellow American Raimi Merrit and Canadian Marie Anne Ball to nab top honors at the Wakeboard World Cup in Singapore at the Bedok Reservoir. Whatever that is.
Once again, an intrepid CRB minion filed this dispatch following the Great Plains Conference Championship.
Oh, how the CRB tentacles reach wide and deep, the following is a first hand account of the Iowa Skeetfest tournament. Amazing what the CRB Minions™ can do!!!“Cory Cassidy of Illinois took the win with 5 @ 28’ off , and coming in 2nd and 3rd was Madison’s sister duo of Heather and Adrienne Donen with 5 @ 22’ and 3 @ 22’ off repectively. In men’s slalom, rookies took 1,2,3. Colorado’s Chris Prem took another win with 4 @ 35’ off, coming in 2nd was Iowa State freshman Matt Knafla with 1.5 @ 35’ off , and in 3rd was UW-Lacrosse’s Chad Rietz with 4.25 @ 28’ off. Saturday finished with women’s jump, just barely fitting it all in before the sunset. In 1st was host Iowa’s Leah Timmerman with a jump of 96 ft. 2nd went to Madison’s Mel Cyra with a leap of 79 ft, and 3rd went to Julie Jahnke of Marquette with a 73 footer.”
“Men’s and women’s trick started bright and early Sunday morning. For the men it was again all rookie competitors Andy Madden of Illinois State (little brother of U of Illinois All Star Christie Madden) and Matt Knafla of Iowa State battling it out for 1st. Andy took the win with 1690, and Matt placed 2nd with 1520. Coming in 3rd was John Roberts from Northern Illinois with 1040. Cory Cassidy took another win in the women’s trick division with a score of 1100, and again Madison took the 2nd and 3rd spots with Beth Kruchten placing 2nd with 820, and Mel Cyra taking 3rd with 700. Men’s jump finished up Sunday’s events. Andy Madden took another win with a huge leap of 132ft. Close on his heels and coming in 2nd was Missouri State’s Cole Kalkbrenner with 125, and in 3rd with 114 was Christian Scharosch of Kansas.”
Your Slalom Champ is? A fucking math equation.
Spy Glass Bitches
Nope, don't pretend. Look, we know that most of us really just jack around all day anyways, but, today is different."MasterCraft is pleased to present the 20th Annual US Open of Waterskiing. The 2007 Open will incorporate a tournament rich in history with a new qualifying format and night tournament for the finals. The event will be presented live to people around the planet via webcast, as we give away over $100,000 in prize money. Please join us, no matter where you are, as we shed some light on Water Skiing, by doing it in the dark!"Whoa!! Doing it in the dark! Sexy!
There is an interesting article in the Marquette Tribune, the Marquette University student newspaper, you know the Marquette Golden Eagles err...WARRIORS!"Every semester, $27 of our tuition goes to the student activity fee budget for Marquette Student Government that covers events and needs of students and organizations on campus. Should every student be responsible for paying a portion of these expenses? After seeing the beginning of this year's allocations, we think not."Oh? And why is that sir?
"Last Thursday, MUSG's first senate meeting for the 2007-'08 academic year conducted the distribution of the budget by the Student Organization Allocation committee for very specific organizations that every student will not take part in. The SOA committee allocated $22,196 among 13 organizations and three club sports teams. The most money ($4,750) was given to the Financial Management Association to participate in the Wall Street Experience. The Coalition of Language Honor Societies was given $3,951 for an on-campus foreign film festival and $3,130 was given to the Waterski & Wakeboard Club to participate in the National Collegiate Waterski Association Nationals."Ok, so what? These groups had their shit together, went through the proper hoops and got some dough. Whats the biggie?
"Not every student participates in these fun and available activities. It is nice to know that they are available, but if students are not taking advantage of the activities, their $27 for this semester is being given to other students or organizations they are not involved in."Well, no shit dude. The man takes all sorts of money from the CRB coffers in the form of taxes to pay for roads and shit we won't ever drive on, or money given to environmentalist types who clean shit that I will never use or to a million other things that, sure its nice they are there, but we won't ever use.
Calvin does not appreciate your bullshit
Hope College's mascot"ULM Warhawks stay on top of the Poll after week 1 of competition. Missouri State moves up 3 spots, not much movement in the top 10 but a lot of shake up at the end. The west and east get underway this weekend which will help solidify the polls.Well, someone better get to the bottom of this with the quickness.
1 Louisiana - Monroe
2 Louisiana - Lafayette
3 Florida Southern
4 Arizona State
5 Alabama
6 Purdue
7 Sacramento State
8 Wisconsin-Madison
9 Texas
10 ILLinois
11 Michigan
12 UC - San Diego
13 Marquette
14 San Diego State
15 Missouri ST
16 CHICO
17 Cal Poly
18 Texas A and M
19 Auburn
20 UC Davis
21 Kansas
22 Michigan State
23 Arkansas
24 Central Florida
25 Cincy
Others Receiving Votes:
ILL ST, Western Washington, K State, Miami, Texas State, Clemson"
My name isn't Sue damnit!
Odd, I am also thinking Arby's
They cut through the gates of the club in Amerden Lane and the clamplike the line from Pulp Fiction when the dude is talking about the guy keying his car. "It would almost be worth him doing it, just so I could have caught him doing it"
securing the vessel and towed the boat to a secluded spot and set fire
to it.
I have a fox on my pants.
See, just look for the blue...shit...your pregnant?
"As of the censusGR2 of 2000, there were 16,136 people, 5,819 households, and 4,393 families residing in the village. The population density was 186.3/km² (482.3/mi²). There were 6,050 housing units at an average density of 69.8/km² (180.9/mi²). The racial makeup of the village was 94.08% White, 1.45% African American, 0.39% Native American, 1.38% Asian, 0.02% Pacific Islander, 1.03% from other races, and 1.64% from two or more races. Hispanic or Latino of any race were 3.37% of the population.
There were 5,819 households out of which 37.0% had children under the age of 18 living with them, 65.0% were married couples living together, 6.7% had a female householder with no husband present, and 24.5% were non-families. 19.0% of all households were made up of individuals and 7.6% had someone living alone who was 65 years of age or older. The average household size was 2.73 and the average family size was 3.15.
In the village the population was spread out with 27.2% under the age of 18, 6.6% from 18 to 24, 31.3% from 25 to 44, 24.2% from 45 to 64, and 10.6% who were 65 years of age or older. The median age was 37 years. For every 100 females there were 98.6 males. For every 100 females age 18 and over, there were 96.7 males.
The median income for a household in the village was $62,856, and the median income for a family was $71,452. Males had a median income of $50,477 versus $30,293 for females. The per capita income for the village was $26,087. About 3.0% of families and 3.2% of the population were below the poverty line, including 2.6% of those under age 18 and 5.1% of those age 65 or over."
Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what??? ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...
