May 31, 2006

Birdman fly in any weather

Youtube pretty much kicks ass. This may not be as surreal as the GI Joe weirdo clip but, this is Freddy Krueger breaking the world record at the 05 masters. Dude Launches.




My favorite part is Freddy hoping around like crazy after the jump. Its tough to look cool with one arm stuck to your side. But he is certainly excited as he should be.

May 30, 2006

Drinking Water + Water Ski = Bad


Fiji? Evian? No, thats ski school water yo.

Here is a recipe for getting your ass kicked off a lake you shouldn't be on.

1) Ski there
2) Have a triathalon want to go there too
3) Health Services tell both to go screw themselves

Thats it.

In Villa Park, CA...the O.C yo...a small water ski school (Cutting Edge Ski School) had been using a canyon resevoir to run their operation. Everything was going along fine until a group looking to organize a triathalon sought permission to use the site as well.

Health Department officials said "WTF? There is a ski school out there? We drink that water, they shouldnt be there."
Heather Collins, a state health official, said the ban on swimming and water-skiing "protects drinking water customers from water-borne diseases."

"I know if I lived in Villa Park, I would be upset about this," Collins said.
Thankfully you don't, then you wouldnt get sick. Plus, you can live somewhere else and do a piss poor job. Especially since you have known about the school since 1997 but only recently put up any fuss because someone took a picture and wondered what was up.

From Cutting Edge website.
We are located in the heart of Orange County off Santiago Canyon Road just east of the 261 & 241-toll road.
or not. It sucks for the ski school, hope you get it ironed out and get back on the water. btw, their website is pretty good for a ski school.

Links:
Reservoir Was Used for Water-Ski School (Los Angeles Times)
Cutting Edge (waterski-school.com)

May 25, 2006

Doing us proud


Striking an ill pose and hitting your with ill flows

Our man who had the honor of winning the innaguraul GBH trophy is not content to sit around getting a big head as the accolades pour in.

No sir, Kurtis is back at it, walking the beat and churning out high-quality copy for NCWSA.Com.

Just look at the prose our main man put into the world of cyber space.
Once again another major collegiate tournament has passed and once again those in attendance left in satisfaction. The 2006 NCWSA Collegiate All Stars was held this past weekend May 20-21 at beautiful Dream Lakes located just outside of Ames, IA.
A dream indeed.

Links:
All-Stars Wrap up (NCWSA.com)
Purdue Ski Team
(Long Url)

Show Ski world takes a break from bashing Janesville


Hey man, I think you are standing on my foot.

At least they are in South Carolina. It looks as though the Carolina Show Ski Team is going to be holding a benifit ski show for a local resident who is suffering from brain cancer.

Jenna Witherspoon, 11, has been battling brain cancer for the last two years and recently was re-diagnosed with it again.

bummer.

From the Fort Mills Times in Fort Mills, SC.
"A fundraiser for 11-year-old cancer patient Jenna Witherspoon will be held Monday at Windjammer Park in Tega Cay.

The fundraiser is a water ski benefit show being conducted by the Carolina Show Ski team and sanctioned by USA Waterski. The benefit will be held from 5:30 to 8:30 p.m.

Organizers hope to raise about $1,200. Money raised will go to Carolinas Medical Center."

If you fancy a trip, or happen to be in the area, by all means swing by donate some dough and help out.

Hopefully this event goes huge, like a wakeboarder or something, and they raise a ton of dough to help out.

Links:
Water ski show planned to help ailing student (Fort Mills Times)
Carolina Show Ski Team (carolinashowski.com)

May 22, 2006

Complete re-cap of Collegiate All-Stars

Well, how about that boys and girls. The Mid-West won the 2006 Collegiate All-Stars! You know what this means?

You guessed it!

They get home field advantage in the collegiate World Series of water ski.

CUBS IN FIVE!!


Before his arm fell off

So, here is the deal.
Mid-west = 8745 points
Western = 6155
Eastern = 1910
South = 0

As it turns out, no one in the south skis anymore. I guess they were all burned out after last weekends Boardup! Miami!.

The residents of the boathouse feel yo pain...those weed hangovers can be hell.


This bus is crap for gas mileage...why didn't I get the prius?

So, here is how it broke down by skier.

Mens Winners:
Jump: Brody Reid (Arizona) 146 feet
Trick: Brody Reid (you again?) 2470 pts
Slalom: Brody Re...oh, I meant Cale Burdick (Purdue) 3 at 39.5

Note to Cale: Dude, go pro. 3 at 38.5 is sick. Take the money and get drafted. I heard that Portland is looking for a good off-guard.

Note to Brody: WTF? 2 of 3? Come on...SACK UP! Don't let that Cale boy punk you...That trophy is yours! You see those groupies slinking away? Get used to it until you start sealing the deal with a better showing then 2 at 38 off for second.

On second thought. 2 at 38?, you could be the first overall pick. Tremendous upside baby!! Lebron who? Bush what?


See, the thing about Brody is he has great upside.

For the much better looking part of the competition.

Women:
Jump: Jenna Sligar (Arizona State) 106 feet
Trick: Jenna Sligar (Come in pairs much?) 1630 points
Slalom: Hanna Edeback (Clemson) 1.5 at 32

Note: Hanna Edeback was the lone women representative from the eastern region. Seeing as the Boathouse is a stationary object, we cannot prove or disprove this. But, maybe the eastern women were suffering from the same thing that the south was going through.

Note 2: Not to nit-pick but isn't Arizona in the south? How would they score no points yet have the first place skier in both Jump and Trick? Unless of course they are considered West...in which case this globe sitting by the green monitor is freaking worthless.


I always though Alaska was more north.

Maybe it is sort of West. But still doesn't it seem more south?

Anyways, Short story long.

While all of this is fantastic and all the people should be congratulated on being awesome skiers, the Green Boathouse has our own special award that is much more meaningful we are sure.

It was a tough competition with many strong competitors staking their claim to the prize.

Anyways, it goes to...


Drumroll....

Purdue's Kurtis Threlkeld!!!

Here is why.
1) 140 foot jump, good for a tie for second place
2) The weirdest/coolest spelling of a last name that we have seen in at least a half-hour.


No, just one. Thanks Maria. See you at home sweetie.

Congrats Kurtis!!

Links:
Collegiate All-Stars Water Ski Championships (usawaterski)

May 19, 2006

If you build it...


"Hey Shoeless...you're whirlybird was off the HOOK!"

There are times when you have stop and realize what a goofy sport we all actually take part in.

This isn't one of those, "oh my god I am 35 and single, miserable, have a crappy job...but I ski so I can oogle 16 year old babes." type moments, but one of those, "Yep, these are my people" types.


A really large aquatic dog-bone

This is a picture of a waterski lake, in the middle of basically a corn field.

Pretty soon the parton saints at the pleasant oak waterski lake will be heading to Red Sox games and kidnapping washed up novelists.

Look at the post below, regarding Collegiate All-Stars and think about your own tournament and waterskiing life. We all ski in the weirdest places, drive insane amount of miles, spend a stupid amount of money and love every second.

It certainly isn't for the fame, no one would know Andy Mapple, Sammy Duvall, Chris Parish or Jimmy Siemers from Jim, Greg or the over-aggresive guy on your softball team.


Ping!

Links:
Softball guy (JoeSportsFan)
Steve's Dad's Waterski Lake (Livejournal.com)

May 18, 2006

Anyone up for a roadtrip?


Bio-Diesel only in this hog

This weekend (May 19-21) near Huxley, Iowa a bunch of college kids will be skiing...more specifically, Iowa State will host the 2006 collegiate All-Stars competition in the sprawling metropolis that is the Hux.

Yo, get a trip-tik.

Huxley, IA is about 30 minutes north of Des Moines, IA on hwy 35. When the drone of your engine and the endless cornfields diminish your capacity for paying attention on the road...then you know you are close.

"How dare you, son!" says the Huxley residents.
"I dare!!" says I

Huxley, IA here are the RAW FACTS!!
Population (year 2000): 2,316,

Est. population in July 2004: 2,345 (+1.3% change)

Males: 1,121 (48.4%), Females: 1,195 (51.6%)

Elevation: 1030 feet

Land area: 1.1 square miles

Median resident age: 32.5 years

Median household income: $48,068 (year 2000)

Median house value: $111,400 (year 2000)

YES!! More chicks then dudes! I am firing up the Chevette and I am on my way!


Look close...closer...closer...SMACK!!

What to expect:
1) Booze
2) Waterskiing

OR.

"Hosted by the the Iowa State Univesity Water Ski Team and Dream Lake Estates, the event promises to set new standards for All-Stars and Team Trials.

Here's what the Iowa State Team has to say about their plans:

'The Iowa State ski team plans to make this an event to remember. Many ideas from the 2005 Nationals hosted by Purdue are already being used so that this is a tournament that makes the athlete feel like they deserve to be there. In addition to this, we want to give every All Star skier the chance to ski in front of a crowd like the pro skiers get the chance to do.'"
Oh..one more thing.

Races in Huxley:

  • White Non-Hispanic (96.8%)
  • Hispanic (1.3%)
  • Two or more races (0.9%)
  • American Indian (0.7%)
  • Other race (0.6%)
Yep, this is definitlay a waterski type town.

Links:
2006 All-Stars and Team Trials (NCWSA.com)
Huxley, IA (Mapquest)
Huxley, IA (City-Data)

May 16, 2006

If anything I could say this (half) cab was rare.




Phillip Soven nabbed first place honors and a cool $10,000 bones in the innaguaral BoardUp! Miami wakeboard tournament last weekend.
"Philip Soven repeatedly wowed the crowd this past Saturday to take home the $10,000 first prize and the title of BoardUp! Miami 2006 Champion. Rusty Malinoski and Danny Harf finished second and third, respectively."
Congrats and golf claps to these three guys, jolly good show mate.

Now for the bad part, Phillip is doing his part to make us all feel old and worthless. Peep this from WakeWorld
"He's not old enough to drive, yet he already has a pimp SUV awaiting the stroke of his 16th birthday, complete with some phat KMC rims and a sound system more befitting a concert hall."
Thats right, Phillip is 15 years old and has been competing since age 11. He won a Pro Tour Stop, the Malibu Open and the X-Games in 2004 and has his own signature board...A Signature KIDS BOARD.

Get it, cause he is a kid.


"pssshh..jeah..i be chillin"

BoardUp! Miami, which must be cool because of the exlamation point, is a Pro-Am wakeboard tournament in Miami, Fl held at the Miami Marine Stadium.

"The Board Up Miami event will be Miami’s first Premier Pro-Am Wakeboard Championship, which will feature a music festival featuring DJ Irie, Atomic Tangerine, The Linx, The Spam AllStars, and DJ Jazzy Jeff, and a wakeboard tournament featuring some of the world's best wakeboarders competiting for over $17,000 in cash prizes and the $10,000 first prize."

Wha, Wha, WHAT!!! DJ JAZZY JEFF!!


I asked her for Adidas and she bought me Zips!

Yo Holmes To Bel Air!!

Links:
Board Up Miami (usawaterski)
Board Up Miami (board-up.net)
WakeWorld
(wakeworld.com)

May 13, 2006

Alliance Wakeboard = Marketing Geniuses


Arrow local union 136 hard at work.

Not content with providing high quality photo's and commentary the folks over at Alliance Wakeboard magazine appear to be branching out into the world of portable refreshment.

We figured that the beverage market was pretty saturated and a tough market to enter, with established big-wigs dominating.

However, that didn't seem to bother them, with a eye catching design and ingenious product placement, "not beer" looks poised to take your local grocery store and convenience market by storm.

Click on the pictures, to see a screen cap from Alliance's website. We put arrows to help direct you to the new drink, and to not be distracted by the girls.


So Thisty!

Links:
Alliance Wakeboard (Alliance)

Web Cast Waterski



Evidently there is such a place, that being an actual website with web-cams. Aren't those supposed to be reserved for lonely housewives and bored co-eds?

YO!! Quit hogging the bandwidth!!

Anyways, as it turns out in a couple weeks there will be some big slalom event in Florida, hosted by Waterski Magazine and it will be streamed on webcast-tv. The links right below will give you the important info.

WebCast-TV.com
or
Waterski mag

From said waterski magazine comes this promo.
"Boat company vs. boat company. Champion vs. champion. Man vs. nature. All that drama and more will be packed into the Shootout. We tried to imagine the coolest slalom battle we - and you - could hope to see, then we set it up. The result is a three-event tournament, but with each event all about slalom."
Right, o.k. A three-event tournament with all three events being slalom. hmm...

So, here is how it works. The competition (or whatever) is broken down into three different categories.

1) Traditional slalom - Basically a bunch of people trying to qualify for the "finals" like a normal tournament.

2) Big spray - 20 middle age fat-guys behind Bayliners.

3) Team competition - A point based team V. team comp...for the most part.

But wait...

Not enough for you? There's more. TRASH TALK!!
DREW ROSS OF TEAM MALIBU: "I'm coming off one of the strongest seasons of my career. And beside me are skiers such as Chris Parrish and current world champion Will Asher, so we feel like we've put together a team that's tough to beat. That said, our competitors are well-seasoned and accomplished. We probably won't do any trash talking - maybe just the cold shoulder."

WADE COX OF TEAM MASTERCRAFT "They have some of the top skiers in the world, but we have depth, too. I like going head to head. I think it's the truest form of competition, where you're not really skiing against the course and not really against yourself, but blatantly skiing against the other guy. It makes it more like tennis or boxing. And yeah, I may resort to old-school tactics, mind games."

Mind games and cold shoulders? I would watch my back Wade, Drew might go Ron Artest on you.


My shoulder is anything but cold

Right, this is all well and good...but here is a better idea for a Slalom Shootout.

In the tradition of the wild west, a real waterski shootout. Pitting man against man in a wicked duel to determine ultimate supremacy, with GUNS and SLALOM SKIS!!

Just imagine.


/Shoot and miss

Your a daisy if you do!

/Buffering 25%

...

...


/Buffering 75%

...

...

/Shoot and kill


Smells like someone died...SUCK IT HOLIDAY!!

On second though, this is going to be great!!!

Links:
WebCast-TV.com (webcast-tv.com)
Waterski mag (Waterskimag.com)

May 11, 2006

Google Trends: waterski

There is now a very interesting google feature lets you track where in the world things are searched for the most. Interesting that Madison, WI is the place where waterski is searched the most followed by Sydney, Australia and then oddly enough Salt Lake City, Utah.

Whew knew that waterskiing was a big deal in Utah. Evidently, its much easier to have a third when you can be married to more then one person.


Hey wives, i want to take a set. Hop in!

May 9, 2006

World University Championships Canceled

It was announced that the 2006 World University Championships in Plover, WI have been canceled.

Christopher Columbus's guide to America

Something in the waterski world, run by waterski types doesn't come out as planned? No Way!!

Here is the annoucement from the frontpage of the USA Waterski website.
"The 2006 FISU World University Water Ski Championships, scheduled for Aug. 30 - Sept. 3 in Plover, wi., has been canceled. The decision was announced on May 8 by the local organizing committee. "This was a very difficult decision for us, but construction delays have made it difficult to have the Centre Lakes AquaPlex ready by the tournament dates," said Holly Neale, chairperson of the LOC. "In the best interest of the teams, officials and spectators making tournament preparations, we felt the decision was a necessary one at this time."

Translation = We screwed up, my bad!!


The God damn plane has crashed into the mountain!!

The 70 million dollar project, Centre Lakes AquaPlex in Plover, WI, is supposedly to include a Cabella's, Resort and waterpark. It is designed to be able to host a variety of water and snow activities. Unfortunately, it was not designed to be able to host Show Ski competitions.
"The amenities on the competition lake will feature a permanent grandstand structure that will seat 15,000 spectators. The grandstands will be complete with skyboxes for VIP's, judges and the media.The lake will also feature a concessions area, amphitheater, dining facilities, media center, soft play area and retail shops."
In all honesty, this is really to bad. I know that people were actually looking forward to this event. Waterskiing being such a popular sport and people in Wisconsin being so passionate about it, this would have been a real nice flagstone event for the state.

However, it really shouldn't come as much of a surprise. Waterskiing is a sport that really struggles to find and/or keep a foothold in the consciousness of the sporting world. Something as big and interesting as the Aquaplex that could go along way to legitimizing the sport, but in another of the eternal bungles of the sport, this isn't going to happen.

When you are a struggling sport that can't figure out a way to beat out poker or bowling on television and are reduced to signing T.V deals with unknown networks and relegating the National Show Ski Championship to a fledgling television network and having it aired MONTHS after the event is frustrating.

For more information, click here for the USA Waterski link or here for the full annoucement or here for info on the aquaplex

G.I Joe PSA

Written words really cant do this clip justice.

The Explanation post

If you are here, you have clicked on something in the sidebar, most likely the actual link, and this is the post where we explain and descibe and whatever various things that we feel need such explaining.

Note, many..if not all..the pictures that are used aren't mine, I didnt take them. They would have found on the infoweb somewhere. If you own them, and are mad and don't want them here, let us know and they are gone. I don't know copyright law well enough to put up a fight. Its all in fun, so hopefully its cool.

Title Pictures:
If you have any pics that you think may be neat, send them along at greenboathouse@gmail.com


A very cool picture that was found of some beach somewhere. The sky is especially cool.


Our namesake, even though couldn't find a pic of the actual boathouse.


Cool picture found accidentaly looking for something else.


Same thing, but, interesting because its a freaking snowmobile. Bet the studs screwed up the surface.


My favorite.


Ha! I don' t know what to say here.


Just a sweet shot of a handle in the water. Skiier was eaten by a dolphin.


Some old ass atari game.


Pic of Day (or whatever) Archives:


No idea where this came from, some random google search turned this up.

Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...