Jun 29, 2011

This Go Pro Vid Owns All Others

So my love of small portable cameras that you can rig to your shit and then go out, do awesome things, and then have a record of that sweet wake jump to face you pulled on your wakeboard. Well, Tash now has a record of himself flying through the air about 300 feet above a lake in Madison Wisconsin. That pretty much beats most of the go pro vids we have seen so far. So Tash has issued a challenge to the rest of you, get off your lazy asses and do some bad ass shit and send the vids to the CRB. If you don't then you suck and we don't want to know you anyways.



Thanks to the Mad-City Ski Team for the vid.

Jun 27, 2011

Vid Day Monday

We have never been to the Turks and Caicos islands. Apperantly we are complete losers that hate waterskiing, dolphins and hot girls. The vid pic for this should really just be a shot of the turquose water, because holy crap does that look amazing. And no, this vid is not just a long vid of girls in little bikinis dancing around, this one over here is though.

From now on, anyone not working on getting the CRB empire set up in Turks and Caicos is dead to me.

Jun 23, 2011

Lake Trout Carry Out

Lake Trout Carry Out is what we are currently calling the random link heap/dump/thing/whatever.

INT hosts its first event in West Virgina. Just ignore the sound of banjos...

Flooding has caused quite a bit of damage along the Mississippi in the past few months, now the snow melt from Canada is flooding locations all along the Missouri River and its tributaries. Skiers and ski clubs all over the western midwest have been affected by this flooding, including the Water Hawks ski team who are being forced to move a show planned for a now flooded river. Rain, rain go away, come again some other day.

Pics like this show why we love tournys...
pic credit

New cable park in Winnipeg Manitoba Canada. As a very pro traditional skiing type of guy I have had somewhat of a change of heart after watching the freestyle guys at the LA Night Jam rock it on the twin tip skis. Those guys learned all this stuff from cable parks and man it was fucking sweet! Our sport wants to get back into the main stream, and slalom is not going to get us there. Distance jumping is hella sweet and can bring in the extreme type personality while freestyle jumping will bring in the wakeboard type crowds. Package those events together and you have something we can sell to TV again.

Speaking of cable parks, here is another one. The popularity of cable parks is good for the sport as a whole but is a threat to the boat manufacturers. Or it could be looked at as a good thing as it is bringing new people into the fold and as they grow in the sport they will look at getting their own boats. So what I am saying is I have no idea what I'm talking about. Hey look over there! Its Elvis! /hides in closet

This is a cool ass house in Florida on some ski lake. The CRB has already hired a hit man to take out the family and will be moving in there once the pesky residents are 'taken care of'.

A ski club that grew in stature due to some of the big name members such as Judy McClintock held a reunion recently.


Being on the water skiing is one of the greatest feelings anyone can experience (if you disagree with us we don't want to know you). Working at a ski school and teaching kids to ski gave the same type of feeling, watching their faces as the kids felt that same joy was awesome. Running adaptive ski events gives an even better feeling, most of these kids will never be able to experience many of the things those of us in the able bodied population get to feel, but using a sit ski with some stabilizers we can give these kids a sense of the freedom we feel on the water. If you ever have the opportunity to help out at one of these events you need to take it. Its hard work but at the end of the day you feel incredible.

This wakeboard event is called BroStock. I am tempted to fly down there and throw rotten tomatoes at who ever thought up that name.

We here at the CRB drink our fair share of booze, hell a lot more then our fair share, but one thing we don't do is get plowed and then fly around in the SkiMasterBu. Because when you do that you end up being like this stupid fucker who killed a guy buy crashing his boat into a house boat and killing the driver of the house boat.

An Iphone app to track your slalom runs. Mine would be easy, lots and lots of falls. woot... :(

This news writer from the UAE hates all those damn kids having fun on the water. I picture him sitting on his palm shaped island paridise and yelling at kids to get off his sand. ...get it...sand, cuz its a desert...oh so now I'm the racist. jeez

If you do a youtube search for Sac Town Gold Rush you get this vid. HEY THATS NOT SKIING!!

Jun 20, 2011

Vid Day Monday

Normally vids like this are fake, but this one looks real. Try enough times and sooner or later you will make it.

Next shot is over the freeway, off the billboard, through the window, off the score board, nothing but net...
/eats fries

Vid Day Monday

More TV ads with skiing. I always thought show skiing was just a US thing...guess not.

Jun 17, 2011

Use The Full Surface of The Ramp

At Coble Ski School I was told to use the full surface of the ramp when jumping. They meant hit at the lower right hand side go off the upper left. These guys misunderstood what that meant...



According to the comments on the pic I took it from they all landed as well. Proper jump form is optional when there are 9 of you going over.

Jun 15, 2011

Go Pro Camera - Show Ski

Show Skiing is actually fun...not just cuz you get to wear awesome ghay costumes but because of the teamwork involved to make a good show and the crowds that come to watch. CRB Minion would say it is because of all the girls you get to look at, but as most of them are 15 he is going to end up in prison.

One view that most guys have never seen is what its like on top of a pyramid. Well thanks to the Ski Bellview show ski team we now have a view from the girl on top. This is just a 3 tier pyramid but it is still a cool view.

Jun 13, 2011

Vid Day Monday

I hate PWC with a passion. Not because they are not fun to drive, they are way way cooler then a bag of hair*, but because 99.7%** of the people driving them are fucking morons.

*but you can smoke a bag of hair
**not a scientific calcualtion

The following story was sent in by CRB reader Jay Gilbert and is from the Houston Chronicle. Lots of BWI (boating while intoxicated) tickets and what not, but it also has this great story of some yahoos taking a PWC and putting an aluminum boat frame around it. Then that contraption sinking. There are some weird things out on the lakes but this may take the cake for odd boating.

Around sunset on May 28, Upshur County Warden David Pellizzari and Gregg County Warden Dewayne Noble were patrolling Lake Hawkins when Warden Noble spotted an overturned boat.
As the wardens approached, they noticed four people in the water, trying to move away from the sinking vessel.

The wardens approached the people, made sure everybody had a life jacket and began the rescue effort.

Two nearby personal watercraft tried to assist by picking up the victims but could retrieve only one person. The other PWC flipped when one of the victims took off his life jacket and started panicking because he couldn’t swim.

The wardens quickly grabbed that subject and loaded him on their patrol boat as he was struggling to keep his head above water.

The remaining two victims helped secure the vessel before wardens towed it to the bank.

The boat was a homemade vessel consisting of a 14-foot aluminum boat built around a jet ski used as the propulsion unit.

The boat, which was clearly overloaded, began to sink when a wave came over the stern


Perfect example of a dip shit driving a PWC. YOU NEED TO GIVE IT POWER TO TURN!!!!!

Jun 10, 2011

Don't Eat and Ski

I like this guys style. The osmosis skiing method has been catching on all over the place...or not...whatever its an ad.

Jun 8, 2011

Nate Smith Will Have Sex With Your Sister and You Will Like It

This kid burst onto the slalom scene last year at the Global Invitational in Michigan. And this year he has joined the top club of slalom skiers by DOMINATING THE HELL out of 41 off.

Nate Smith has proven he is the real deal and at the pace he is improving he will be running 63.75 off by the middle of next season. HE IS THAT GOOD!!!

/Does Flip While Fliping

Freestyle skiing was a major part of the pro waterski tour until the tour fell on hard times and died off back in the '90s. This stuff is awesome to watch and the crowds loved it. Our current "pro tour", if you want to call it a pro tour, focuses way to much on slalom skiing. Don't get me wrong I love slalom but damn does it get boring to watch after a few hours. The way jump has been coming back is great to see, but tricks has been completely ignored which is very sad to see.

Freestyle though saw its first cash prize event at the Malibu open last year and this year the word is there will be two freestyle events. The cash is sparse and it is unlikely that the likes of Matt May or Dave Reinhart would pick up their skis for anything less then about $10,000 in prize money. Even without the top names from the old tour showing up these events will still be cool to see. At the Malibu Open last year the winner landed a solid two ski mobe and a one ski gainer, while the other competitors threw many one ski gainers and front flips. There was even a 16 year old kid landing solid gainers and fronts and coming up just short on a mobe, brings to mind the young Matt May.

This year the freestyle event is returning to the Malibu Open and has added another event at the LA Night Jam. Freestyle Jumping in the south has whole heartadly embraced the new twin tip skis and this has led to some sweet new tricks being introduced. Tricks like hitting the ramp backwards and doing a laid out back flip landing backwards or 540 degree spinning front flips. The CRB crew will be attending the LA Night Jam as we have the past 3 years. Bennetts and the crew running the Night Jam are forward thinking and def bringing skiing back to where it needs to be.

Jun 6, 2011

Vid Day Monday

1400 Horse Power pulling 2 skiers at over 110 MPH. I have said this before and I will probably say it again SKI RACERS ARE NUTS.

Vid Day Monday

Freddy gives a run down on what jumping is for the London Night Jam in '09. Freddy is all around one of the coolest guys in any pro sport. He loves the sport and is crazy good at it, but the fact that he understands the need for the crowds and is right there in the forefront pushing for events that will grow the sport is what makes him great. At the LA Night Jam II he gave a victory speech that was a perfect example of how a pro athlete in a sport trying to grow should act. He is a great example of a skier others should try to imitate.

We did a little survey here of how the CRB guys respond when they win events.

Dig Dug: /digs hole so all other competitors fall in
Life Jacket: /grows long hair, gets hippie girl friend
CRB Minion: Asked us what waterskiing is
ODBF: /taunts everyone while waving around 5th place medal out of 4 skiers in event
Rowboat Abides: /waves shotgun while screaming "git off my lawn you whipper snappers"

Jun 2, 2011

Jaret Llewellyn Wrecks Knee Again

Jaret announced via Twitter this morning that he has torn his ACL again.

@jaretllewellyn
Jaret Llewellyn
Think i am going to be sick! Did my ACL again! %#/!




And the inevitable consequence of an injury like this came in a release from LA Night Jam:

LA Night Jam
has breaking news. Jaret Llewellyn has re-injured the left knee ACL that he tore last season at the Masters and has decided to withdraw from LA Night Jam IV. We wish him the best of luck as he tries to recover from this latest set-back...


All of us who have had the pleasure of blowing our knees up can agree that we had the same sick feeling when we realized our seasons were over. We wish Jaret all the best in dealing with such a awful injury.

LA Night Jam IV

LA Night Jam is back again this year and as in years past the CRB crew will be loading up the CRB Scooter of fury and heading on down to Bennetts for a weekend of debauchery and general hooliganism.




Jun 1, 2011

Another Reason Why Slo-Mo Sucks


Watch this video a couple times. Go ahead, do it. We will wait.

Here is what you are thinking right now.

  1. Thats probably fake
  2. They still make hot-wheels 
  3. Whoever that driver is pretty good. 
Lets take a look at number 1 though.  Its probably fake. 

You know why we think right away that its fake...GAH.  Enough set up for this.  ITS GOD DAMN SLOW MOTION!!!

Let us say this once again and loud enough for everyone to hear it.  

SLOW MOTION SUCKS!  IT ADDS NOTHING, IT IS NOT ARTISTIC, IT DOES NOT PROVIDE ANY DEPTH TO YOUR VIDEO.  ITS TERRIBLE AWFUL NO GOOD VERY BAD VIDEO!!

GOD DAMN IT!!!!!!

STOP IT PLEASE. 

A slalom pass does not look better when its slowed down, a jumper doesn't look better, a wakeboarder doesn't look better, your porn tape does not look better.

NOTHING LOOKS BETTER!!!!

Please please for the love of christ stop it!!  

The video above is totally based on the speed of the car and the jump, the driver guy hauling ass and flying like a maniac over, we guess, 4 miles before landing on the ramp on the other side.  Its awesome, its an amazing feat if it is real.  The speed that he hit that ramp and flew is awesome.  

When you slow it down it looks fake.  Which, honestly, this video probably is...but, what the hell???

The most frustrating thing about writting when angry about something is not having the proper ability to convey the level of frustration that comes with a video like this.  

When we did the reviews of some of the waterski videos a year or so ago, one of the biggest complaints was the slo-mo shots.  

Lets revisit that argument for a second.  

Our sport, Waterskiing, is a sport built on speed, timing and strength.  Its built on grace and balance and brains.  Its built on an the extraordinary ability to command various planes of pull required to pull off any motion.  

It is a sport that lends itself to an artistic eye, something that we can view and appreciate, but, its not something that should be appreciated at a pace that doesn't do it justice. 

Watch the Masters webcast and marvel at the various styles of the skiers (granted we only saw the slalom part), but, in slo-mo watching Jon Travers and Will Asher would NOT do either of them justice.  Their styles are uniqely different, their paths to the buoy are different...each individual pass is different, yet with the same results. 

If you were to slo-mo their runs they would look the same.  

Going slowly around a buoy and making a big spray?  NO!!!

That takes away from what it is about each skier that makes them special.  You have to view it at real time.

For example, in our Masters review we thought that both Will and Regina took to much speed into the two-ball, which may be 100% incorrect, but, damnit, thats what it looked like.  

Person: "Oh, but Dig Dug, thats a tournament, you can't have slo-mo there...thats dumb"
Dig Dug: "and?"
Person: "a ski video is showing the cool images of what skiing can look like"
Dig Dug: "you are a fool...and let me explain why"

Slow motion video is useful for a number of reasons.  If a receivers foot is in-bounds on a reception, if a particular pitch is in the strike zone, if Marcus Brown gets the 4-ball on his pass.  

Its something that can be used judicially for specific times and for specific purposes. 

But, we think that its used by people to try an artificially art up some scene without the proper ability to convey the real heart of our sport. 

This is certainly not meant as a barb at the people who have put money into making these videos, simply, this is meant to try and put forth this idiom. 

Our sport is built on speed and power and you have to take it as a whole...you notice the incredible ability of a Will Asher when watching him run a 38 off pass at full speed vs. most of the rest of us trying to get a 15 off pass...you slow us down and we look good.  

The ease that he goes around the buoys, the way he builds for the wake cross, the deceleration, the turn.  

At full speed it is a sight to behold.  

That is the point, our sport needs to be viewed at full speed to really appreciate the incredible artistry that is inherent to our sport.  

We are all lucky in that we happen to waterski and has such a natural beauty to it that doesn't need to be screwed with to properly present it on a screen.  It does that on its own.  

Celebrate what it is that makes this sport so special, celebrate what makes the best skiers we have great.  Its not their spray, its not a slowed down turn, its not a shot of a jumper moving slow into a sunset. 

Its a stunningly powerful turn around a buoy, its a flip-flip-flip combo thingy from a trick skier, its the insane speed and power and grace that a freddy or a dodd or a llewellyn pull into a ramp, its a damn whirlybird!!!

Christ, just STOP WITH THE SLO-MO!  We get it, you have a great digital HD camera.  With great power comes great beer.  Drink and use both wisely!!


Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...