Apr 27, 2010

Dreads on the Webz TV

We often talk about how our sport needs more personality, right now our sport is made up of a bunch of white guys that were spoiled as kids and speant their days on the water.

Oh and how that life freaking ruled!!

But then along came some crazy west coast hippy who added a bit of style to the shore line of pro events. Marcus Brown appears to do nothing but snow ski, water ski, drive around the country in a big rig with his fitness instructor wife while coaching waterskiers... and parade around some awesome dreads. Ok so I guess thats alot of stuff.

I met Marcus back before he had made a name for himself . He was going to talk at a clinic and I was drunk stumbling hotel room to hotel room the night before. We all drank for awhile, he talked about west coast slalom for awhile. I ignored him and have only gotten worse at swerving since then.

ODBF = Dumb as a bag of hammers

Dig Dug: But you can smoke a bag of hammers

ODBF: /pimp slap

Well since that night when I learned nothing Marcus has continued to kick ass and take names. A few months back he started MarcusBrown.tv. The show runs every Monday night at 9PM EST 6PM PST and is well worth watching.

Faithful CRB reader Cris Kodiak, chair of the Midwest region of the NCWSA (largest region of the 4) will be the guest this coming Monday. Cris is way better at our own puzzle game then all of the CRB staff put together. Marcus will probably only be asking questions about Cris's "Puzzle Me Together" skills.

Off Sport Awsomeness

I used to go to a few basketball games a year, then I realized that I could not care any less about a sport then I do about the NBA. Bunch of over paid 7 foot tall cry babies who...


/buys season tickets

Apr 26, 2010

ULM Bayou Classic is dominated by the CRB

Oh hey look here! The A team women trick results from the "ULM Bayou Classic". Ok scores...little low...guess its spring...well done Tina...

/double take

///triple take

CRB Girl for life Danyelle Bennett in...9th...place...

/uses some more "..." for effect

WTF Danyelle? That is not how the CRB rolls, WE WIN SHIT LEFT AND RIGHT!!

/loses at tic tac toe

If you want the rest of the scores check out the awsome score sheet pics over here


This is Ryan Hinkle landing his first trick ski front in a tournament. Awsome stuff! This is a trick that needs to score more, especially since I beat the shit out of myself trying to learn it. Trick skiing sucks...

Really now that I think about it Trick skiing needs to be banned. That damn event is to hard and I dont win it enough to make it worth having it at any tournaments.

This is a vid to help drum up dollas to help get kiwi back on his feet. It is a very good cause so dig deep in your hearts and your pockets and fire over some dollas. Its warms ones heart to know that skiers stand behind each other all the way.

Apr 24, 2010

CRB Brings the Sexy


/takes chill pill

ODBF here has been attempting to institute some regular weekly posts to help fill your CRB addiction. YAY Video Mondays, Lake Trout Carry Out (which reminds me that has been missing for a few...weeks...damn), and now the CRB proudly presents "CRB Brings The Sexy"!!!!!11!!!!!ELEVEN!!!!! This post will come out every saturday* and smack you in the face with the best of the Sexy in the waterski** world.

*whenever the hell ODBF feels like it
**whatever ODBF finds in the BLAGOSPHERE


This video shows the main reason we ever started reading Alliance Wakeboard mag, which is a great mag by the way (hint hint all you other guys), the crazy hot reef ads. The ads are not very subtle, they get right to the point of BLAM ASS!!!!! and the collective CRB goes THUMP THUMP ***ASSSPLODE***


Miss Reef Argentina from Paul Fisher on Vimeo.

//moves to Argentina

Apr 21, 2010

Who Am I - Puzzle Me Together V7

It has been awhile since we thru some puzzles your way. Each picture is a hint. Post your answers in the comments, and if you would like to make a puzzle hit up the contact POS CRB car!

Apr 19, 2010

Vid Day Monday Round 2 - Subs and jumpers

This right here is why boat racing is awsome.


And this right here is why Jumping is awsome.

Freddy: /FLYS
Freddy: woot!

Vid Day Monday

It has been said before on the skiflies that one of the things holding back our sport is the lack of characters. By that they mean we dont have the top name out there getting in the news all over the place. So by that rational it appears it would be better if Freddy Kruegar would get busted for dealing drugs, Jamie Bueschane needs to smash up hotel rooms and throw his ski at the front desk clerk, and Ryan Dodd needs to shoot himself in the leg in a strip club... I mean really guys, are we asking to much of you here? Like the song says "lets get retarted in here"...


They could just fight on the shore...wait, they already do that.


We could just learn how to celebrate with the best of them.

Chris Parrish: /back flip

Apr 16, 2010


Ok this upcoming tournament in Geneva sounds awsome. Not because of the event itself but because its name is "Gladiateurs de la Rade".

On my signal unleash hell. oh and cut at the ramp

Oh not that kind of Gladiator. Lame. If you gave Ryan Dodd or Sebastian Di Pasqua(sp?) a sword and bad ass helmet those guys would scare the shit out of you.

That is just a straight up awsome pic. Its got the rich ass French Swiss look to it with the background and the boat then its got complete awsomeness up front provided by our friendly swiss jumper.
We are so going* to this event and dressing as Crixus, Spartacus and the rest of those bad asses from the Starzz show Spartacus and bringing our kick ass rig with us. (if you have not seen that show you are dead to me)
*not really
/staps self in leg with fake sword

Apr 12, 2010

Vid Day Monday - Human = Monkey

This stuff is awsome...if your into people flying around and jumping off shit. Which lucky for you guys I am.

That was tagged "freestyle walking" (note its not, its called Parkour), but that got the ODBF thinking about freestyle jumping. This shit is just cool and looks quite painful.

There is an line front mobe in there...that shit is just nuts.

And speaking of freestyle jumping it appears that The Malibu Open will be having a freestyle event. As the malibu open is going back to the showski state (minus the good doc) it would only make sense that is where freestyle jumping it make its return to pro events. I am told that Dolphin Wetsuits teamed up with Dana Reed to bring this event back.

I have heard from my spies* placed deep in underworld of waterskiing that not only will there be freestyle jumping, a night jump, mens slalom, but sponsers may be coming forward and putting up the dollas to bring in the ladies as well. This could be quite the event.

*monkeys with iphones

I think the CRB staff will be adding this event on to our summer plans. So that means we will be terribly busy with the LA Night Jam in June and The Malibu Open in August. Ok so we wont be very busy at all...beer drinking takes alot of time you know!!

Apr 8, 2010

Reason 48 Why Our Sport Rules

For those of you in the know, last year the CRB staff took a road trip to Bennets Ski School to partake in the LA Night Jam festivities.  If you don't remember our recap of the event, shame on you, you can refresh your memories here.

We were struck by a number of things, the camaraderie between the skiers and the people watching and the slick, professional way in which the tournament/event ran.  This stands in contrast to many of the ski events that we as a CRB or as individuals have experienced in our 100 or so years of in-depth reporting.

It was to us a glimpse into the future of what can be for our sport.  Something that other events should take note of, what the participants should take note of, etc.  We left late the next afternoon, massive hang overs in tow, still elated at the experience.

One of the more poignant moments of the event was a speech, or tangent, from Freddy in regards to our sport from a structural perspective. 

This was our, my, final bit from last years post.
Freddy, when he was interviewed either in the water or on stage, was pretty emotional or passionate, about supporting the community of our sport, noting that there wasn't a Chevy or whatever as a title sponsor, but, yet, in these economic times that there was probably at least 20 or 30 companies that stepped up and gave money to both advertise for themselves and also support something they believe in.

And THAT, I think, is the crux of the whole thing, this event, the LA Night Jump brought everyone together as a microcosm of what we all can do as waterski community, what we can do to push this sport forward.

So, beyond just how excellent the event was on its own merits, it also seems to have provided the template future growth, and that is why the LA Night Jam was so memorable.
This was something that we have kicked around in the CRB halls since.  It was nothing more then a few sentences spoken after stomping the jump into splinters, but, something that stuck with us since.

No matter your particular allegiance to any specific company, we at the CRB have our own personal faves, but it was more to the "look who has your back, look who sweats the sweat and bleeds the blood and drops the dough to help out."

It was so good.  The feeling was that we are all in this together, as one big, spread out and dysfunctional family of waterski.  Push comes to shove though, we can talk shit about each other within our own walls, but, outside of that, we stick together to promote, to help and to push our sport to, or possibly back to new heights.

Well, the LA Night Jam FB site, which is updated constantly, found Freddy's speach and uploaded that bitch to the youtubes for all of us to see, and remember.

Ignore the first little bit with the douchers talking over it (note, we may have been one of those yakking...there was a fair amount of beer being dranked) and concentrate on the 49 second ish mark and on.  Thats the money shot.  Its something that if you really like our sport and you really care about it, it will remind you of what and why we do what we do.  Its simple, to the point and hits home.

Thats how you do it, thats how you debate. Remember, Night Jam is only a couple short months away, June 5th. Get off your ass and get there. You will not regret it.

 So are we cat, so are we.

Apr 5, 2010

Monday Vid Day - Round 2 GOOOOOOAAAAAAALLLLL or not

This guy wins CRB award for "best fail at reporting a soccer game". That is a new CRB award...I just made it up...


What does this have to do with Skiing? Well it is a perfect example of how the ODBF would announce a ski tournament.

Tadd: OH and that was an AMAZING jump!

Tony: Yes it was Ang...e...li...ki An...Dra...Po...Lou

/puases for dramatic effect

kicked a big one there. Lets go to our man on the dock .

/pauses for dramatic effect

The O.D.B.F

/over pronounces British Style

ODBF: ......

Tadd: ODBF are you there

ODBF: /to concessions stand

Yes and I will take 3 miller lites, 2 Shiner Bock Darks and 4 slices of peperoni pizza.

Tadd: ODBF what did you think of that huge game changing jump

ODBF: /stuffs face with pizza
//slams all five beers

huh...whats that Tadd?

Tadd: Angelikis jump...were you watching?

ODBF: oh yea. Butler in the finals, amazing right?

Tadd: /Face Palm

Vid Day Monday

And back for another Vid Day Monday, this time with the worlds strongest man footing and three guys with to much time on their hands.


Oh but very nice wake skating, wake boarding, footing and jumping. And I'm going to guess that landing backwards at 100 something feet does not feel good. Just a guess though.

And then for the big man.

WTF with footing while sitting in a handle? Thats not barefooting, learn like a man. Go out there and step off 50 times and get some good face plants in. Worlds strongest man my ass...sissy girl.

/runs and hides

Apr 4, 2010

Happy Easter

Happy Easter everyone. CRB is celebrading in traditional style as always with beer, bbq and boats. its a tradition unlike any other.

Apr 1, 2010

CRB Site News - Rowboat Abides Addiction

The CRB global office issued a press release in regards to the unfortunate news that made its way on to the hallowed pages of the CRB.


The Rowboat Abides, our founder and for years our main correspondent has battled an addiction that afflicts millions of Americans and has lead to many back alley boob jobs. This is a sad time for the CRB family and we ask that donations be made in the form of $1,000,000 checks mailed to

Help the ODBF get hella rich fund
10 CRB lane
Internetville USA 98765

The CRB family is giving its full suport to The Rowboat and have checked him into the top rehab clinic in the world.

The Rowboat has request in lieu of donations that everyone send in dvds of nip/tuck and pictures of your mom.
**Horton we ask that you pass on this offer**


Its been a great 4 years. The CRB has reached heights reserved only for the gods of men. Yet, all good things have to end. So, it is me, Rowboat Abides, one last time, saying thanks and we wish everyone well. CRB lives on in all of you.


**Obvious Update**

Welp, that takes care of that.

Radiohead-Karma Police
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Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...