Mar 5, 2013


Doesn't that look fun??  Yes?  Well, good news people, the Parker International Waterski Races are being held this weekend in Parker, Arizona!


Oh, you don't know where Parker Arizona is?  Its sort of right by Lake Havasu, which means spring breakers! Woo Hoo, wet t-shirts and booty shaking contests (?) and drunk people.

Oh, I know you are on the edge of your seat right now saying things like, "Holy Shit man, How can I partake in this fun" and "I need this in my life immediately!"

Us Too!  So, we are going to break out the Chevette from storage and fire that bitch up and get moving!

ooh, that fake wood paneling, so sexy
Remember the Chevette?  It is SO single and ready to mingle you guys, seriously, I don't know why y'all are still reading from the intertubes and get your ass's to CRB HQ now!  We are readying a cooler with ALL THE CHEEZ ITS and "numerous" smoked meats.

Its time to rage!!

Thats not enough for you?  Look at that picture above, shit like this could THEORETICALLY happen!!  Boats crashes!  Ski Racing!  Possible overdoses of meth!!  Its RIGHT HERE FOR YOU!

*bleep boop bop bop poooob*

Oh my, what is this?  BREAKING NEWS!!  Lets go right away to our action 5 massacre news team!

nice hat dickhead

Male News Anchor : "This just in to the news desk, Parker International Waterski Race is going on this weekend in Parker Arizona, Pam?"

Female News Anchor : "Shit is going to be CRAAZZYYY"  *rips off shirt, slams a Busch Light, Punches out kangaroo*

So, Lets do this folks!  This starts March 9th!  And Parker Arizona is AT MOST 5 hours from ANYWHERE in the United States.  GET ON IT!

Officer Buck?  What do you think about this???

shit is thirsty


Speak now. Give us your tired your hungry your weak. We will make them into CRB Staff

Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...