Mar 26, 2013


Scene: Inside a high school auditorium, Principle Hagman steps to the microphone whilst all the random kids are milling around like jerks.

Principle Hagman...natch
*Taps microphone*

*feedback noise*

Hagman: "Attention everyone, may I have your attention please??  Stewie!  I see you, can you please take your seat??  Stop trying to touch Maggie, she isn't interested in you, haven't we all ready had this discussion???""

*kids still talking and carrying on*

Hagman: /shoot pistol in the air

*everyone shuts their damn mouth and sits down*

Hagman: "Thank you, I know we are all restless and ready to go support our team, the Blizzard Dwarfs in the big sports game this evening, led by star quarter man Smily McSmimmelman!!!"

*everyone hoots and hollers*

McSmimmelman: /makes pistols gesture at Amanda the hot cheerleader girl

McSmimmelman: "pew pew pew"

*Everyone just totally loses their shit*

Hagman: "HAHA, oh McSmimmelman you are such an all-american hero, hell son, you can date my daughter...or son...whatever, I don't judge"

*Hagman makes a serious face...everyone gets really quiet*

Hagman: "But folks, there is a reason I brought you all in here today...and its something of the utmost importance, our great community of Creve Coeur Lake in St. Louis is about to take a giant leap into the future of sporting sports....this goes beyond baseball, beyond footballs, beyond whatever that is with ice and sticks."

*Someone yells out 'Hockey'*

Hagman: "LOL, like thats a real thing!!....ANYWAYS, on September 14th of this year of our great lord and savior we will be hosting.....can you guess?"

*Everyone yells out nonsense, "Space Shuttles!!"  "Zero Gravity Boxing?"  "Haunted Pig Roast Sport?"*

Hagman: "No, good guess's, especially you Larry with the upside down cow pie eating contest but no...A WATERSKI NIGHT JUMP!!!"

*Everyone goes absolutely bonkers, falling all over themselves, some even start to openly weep*

Hagman: "Thats right!!!  Its going to be called Mid West Night Fly!!  CAN I GET A AMEN!!???"

*Everyone Amens*

Hagman: "I encourage everyone to check out for more information!!"

Hagman: "Now, Let me get a go Blizzard Dwarfs on 3.   1.....2......3!!"

Everyone: "BLIZZARD DWARFS!!!"

*Everyone goes apeshit running out of the gym*


There will be another night jump this summer at Creve Coeur lakes in St. Louis this summer on the 14th of September, it would be in your best interests to go to these various web links


1 comment:

Speak now. Give us your tired your hungry your weak. We will make them into CRB Staff

Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...