May 11, 2010

Don't Go In There for 35-45 Minutes...

So the boys over at Alliance Wake have posted a vid of a guy throwing what appears to be a toe side whirlybird 720. Which as we all know wakeboarding can not use names that even remotly describe the trick, so instead they have named it a Big Perm. As a Big Worm is a toe side whirly 5 this would be the big perm.

This would be a big worm. and freaking gross.

This would be big perm. and one scary mo focca

While this would be neither of the above, because those are both the stupidest names in the history of sport. Attempt to put some sort of description of what is being done into the name of the trick. Every sport is allowd a few eccentricities but good gravy* guys give us a break.

*MB thinks we are too loose with our foul language, so that one is for you Marcus.

Its like I need a damn interpreter to talk to wakeboarders. ex "I threw a sweet stalefish into that twitty bird bra" When I hear shit like that I want to stab you in the eye with my foot. (how does that work? hell if I know) Instead he could have said "I threw a air mobius with no handle pass and tweaked it out with a cool grab by my back foot". (mobius is an acceptable term as its a sweet trick and been around since the begining).

Ok really my sentance structure and terms suck, so my argument appears somewhat invalid, but then I looked up a wake board terms website and wanted to light my head on fire.

Alliance guys,

We still love you, you have the best site in all of watersports. Well except that one that the minon found that one time. yea that one was cool...

love you always,



  1. Pretty sure you forgot to add the part about staying off your lawn.

  2. that is a pretty cool trick though. but, correct me if i am wrong, isn't that just a whirly bird landed blind?

  3. i belive a whirly bird is a heel side trick. because a whirlybird is based on the rider taking off perpendicular to the water (ie tantrum) then throwing a full spin with no handle pass (over the head). now why the hell would they make that so difficult. call it a tantrum mobe and be done with it. (they get tantrum cuz i cant think what to call a back flip where the board is perpendicular to the skiers rotation.

  4. this is why I suck at wakeboarding. i have no idea what any of that meant. all i do know is this.

    1. Whirly birds are awesome
    2. Rallies are pretty cool too
    3. ...
    4. Profit?

  5. allright damnit. we are going to need to put CRB research on all the different wakeboard tricks

    venn diagrams and shit

  6. CRB reaserch mean the monkeys in the other room? sorry i have them working on new and exciting videos that i can use so i dont have to think when posting


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