Rowboat is posting twice in one day, the uploadable trout was extra uploadable. The Rowboat CRB contract states that the Rowboat must post once a week (the friday post), plus, the Rowboat must continue to spread the CRB off-topic goodness.
Unless something major happens over the weekend, the CRB is a pretty slow webberbloggy during the prime drinking days. But, to maybe give y'all something to maybe talk about/comment about or maybe just to give you a few ideas as to what to munch on we are offering a top five list of the best munchable foods.
First, here are a few rules to this list.
1) This isn't a list of things that really require any more then MAX 5 min to prepare. If you wanna munch, dang it, you wanna get your grub on and not screw around.
2) These foods require a minimum of dirty dishes, again, its a pain in the butt to get hungry and then have a huge mess to clean up.
3) Um, that's about it. Quick and easy. Like your moms!!!
ok, here we go.
CRB top 5 munchable foods for your drinking/hangover.
Like you would expect anything else from us. But, these have it all. Cheez and the ever difficult to define "it". Cheesy squares of cracker. You don't need to mess around and put anything on em, you just pop open the box, put your hand in and eat. Pssh, nothing to it!
Besides, they come in a variety of different cheesy goodness flavors, like, white cheese (racist snack!!) and spicy cheese (CALIENTE!!) and others.
2) Chips and Salsa
Normally, you would say nachos. but, really, if you are to do nachos the right way, like, the real right way, you need some chicken or beef or some sort of meat type product, some cheese, some guac, maybe some sour cream, etc etc, to really make a good plate of nachos. PLUS! that crappy shredded cheese you get at the store doesn't melt the right way, you have to get either that queso stuff or whatever that kind of cheese that doesn't get all hard and nasty after a min and a 1/2.
Personally, we go for a plate of Tostitos minis, chopped up chicken bits, melted cheese, chopped jalapenos, chopped green pepper, guac, sour cream, cilantro and it may be cheating a bit, but, drop of bit of the store bought salsa on there. The best thing about nachos is you can put anything on there, serious, try nachos with random leftovers, like, tuna caserole nachos? Tasty, some pasta thing you ruined? NACHOS! its all good.
NOW! The chips themselves are pretty important, those big ass triangles are OUT! They are bad, they don't fit into the top of the jar of salsa, so, we recommend going with either Frito Scoops (which are rad) or the, we think, the tostitos minis, there is also mission tortilla strips that may or may not be available by you.
For the salsa? There are a zillion options, if you have a decent grocery store by you, try their stuff that you get at the deli counter, where the CRB is located, there is a grocery store that has some AWESOME house salsa that has the perfect amount of cilantro and spice to kick your ass just soft enough to make us think of our ex-girlfriend, you know, bring a happy tear to your eye? If these options don't work, try either Pace Hot or Tostita Queso.
Chef boyardee is really probably satan in a pair of white pants and a backless tube top, but, who smokes and offers your drugs and is dating a football player or something. Tempting as hell, you wanna do it, but, in the back of your mind you know that its really bad for you and eventually you need to grow up.
Think about it, and we all do it, guy or girl (not all girls, some are smart), but, we walk down the aisle at the store and see the tasty goodness that is Beef-A-Roni, or ravioli or whatever else devilish concoction the devil has whipped up, stuffed with salt and preservatives and jammed in a can, just waiting for you to say, "ahh, screw it, i need me some of that."
Well, yeah, like that "last" drink or "one smoke won't hurt" and so on, it tempts you.
Thats why its so good!!! You know its wrong but you want it anyways!! GIVE IN TO THE GOODNESS!!
4) Hot Pockets
These are sort of like your booty call. You don't talk to them on a regular basis, you don't really care that much about them, and if they were to go off with someone else you wouldn't be that heart broken. However, when you want yourself some tasty goodness, well...they are there for you.
At the gas station? Sitting there waiting for you.
At the corner market? Looking good!!
In your freezer at home? You have taken the relationship to far!!
Its so easy, open the package, heat it up, eat! My god, it is a booty call!!
5) Grilled Cheese Sandwich w/ Tomato Soup
This one is close to not making the cut as it does require a bit more prep then the others, however, if you do it right, it takes at minimum one bowl, at most, a bowl, a pot and a pan. Or, for some of you, a bowl, some pot with a bowl, and a pan.
See, what is really nice about this one is that, well, its really freaking good and soup is always a good thing after drinking. Either that same night or in the morning/afternoon.
The CRB staff does it this way, throw the Tomato soup into a microwave safe bowl and throw in the microwave, toast two pieces of break, then when the soup is done, put cheese in bread (preferably two slices of cheese and some Tabasco and spicy mustard) then toss that in the microwave for 20 seconds. Viola!!
Total time start to finish? 2 1/2 min. Thats what she said!!
Tacos/burritos: These are the best, but, in this situation to much damn work and taco bell is terrible.
Salads: Any decent salad has to have chicken on it as well as tomatos, green peppers, cheese and a bunch of other stuff that makes salads good. They are good, no question, and good for you, but, in this situation, just to damn tough to make.
Burgers: Nothing better ever then a good burger, but, again, they fall out of the list because it takes to long. Same goes to steaks, chicken, turkey and your sister.
Delivery Food: Again the time situation, even the fastest places ever can't beat five min. Cheesy Bread? Burritos? Chinese? sorry, it ain't happenin.
Hall of Fame:
Sandwiches: These go without saying. Turkey sammy? Chicken sammy? PBJ? They are all good, you grew up on them, you eat them now and they are like your connection to home. Always good, won't leave but will expect you to get married soon!!
What you got????
This song is so ridiculous and there is no reason why we should like it as much as we do, but then ag... "excuse me" yes? "ex...
There may be TV segments as funny, maybe, but there is nothing funnier then this clip, norm macdonald and dennis miller from the Dennis Mill...
On Supa Bow™ sunday the CRB crew was given $20 gift cards to Dave and Busters or Outback Steakhouse (their choice). The CRB strives for a h...
Ok then, 2020 sucked and we are now in a new year, hell yeah, time for all the good shit to happen. You are probably like, "hey, crb i...