Oct 10, 2008

The Kinda Weekly Football Rundown Part Three.

Rowboat is back to dispense college football knowledge, the Rowboat tied up to a dock and plugged the 28.8 modem into a trout and uploaded.

Three weeks in a row!! This is like a CRB record of some sort, we actually started something and followed through for more then a day at a time!


Well, with the national tournament of the collegiate waterski peeps about a week away, as if the splash page at NCWSA hadn't already clued you into that.

Yep, there you go boys and girls and in an amazing display of coincidence, the host school, Arizona State University have leap-frogged into the top eight knocking out Iowa State.

Awww, poor Cyclones...but, you can probably drown your sorrows with some of the ASU girls, should you be into that sort of thing.

Don't get to crazy, as ASU did ax their cheerleading squad a while ago for being somehow toooo sexy...which...just does not seem to compute.

Isn't that what ASU is sort of known for? Bringing the sexy? Are we wrong?

Well, ASU did deny it...but, whatever...that was SOOOO last year. This is now! Lets do this damn thing!

Here is the list for the last two weeks, as noted, ASU scantily danced their way into the top eight while prancing and pillow fighting Iowa State out the door.

See what I did there?

Week 5

1 Univ of Louisiana Monroe ULM 67815
2 Univ of LA Lafayette ULL 66545
3 Florida Southern College FSC 64300
4 Arizona State University ASU 58870
5 Purdue University PUR 58820
6 Univ of Wisc Madiso6n MAD 57725
7 University of Alabama ALA 57145
8 University of Texas TEX 54880

Week 4

1 Univ of Louisiana Monroe 65695
2 Univ of LA Lafayette 64675
3 Florida Southern College 62680
4 Purdue University 57310
5 Univ of Wisc Madison 56260
6 University of Alabama 55525
7 Iowa State University 53190
8 University of Texas 52325

1) ULM

Well Well Well, last weeks blood feud for top spot in the history of waterski domination, obviously besides Hope College, was not real good for the ULM Warhawks, as they were defeated by their bitter, horrible and RAGE FILLED foes from ULL...The RAGIN CAJUNS!!

The Warhawks lost a tight, nip and tuck, defensive battle, 44-35.

Yeah, so, what that basically means is everyone knows that college football is by far the most important thing ever...at least if you listen to sports talk radio where the CRB is located. Which, ironically enough is in a state with no colleges.


2) ULL

Of special note for this game, the Cajuns running back, Tyrell Fenroy, rushed for a school record 297 yards. Yes..297 yards, and is on pace to become the Cajuns leading career rusher.

Whoops, I meant leading rusher in Sun Belt Conference history. Not only that he is only 250 yards from becoming only the 7th person in the history of the NCAA to have 4 seasons of over 1000 yards rushing.

Good lord, in looking at that game, he only had 20 rush attempts, but, for 297 yards. Almost 15 yards a rush. Note to ULM, you may want to consider a new style of defense, its something I jotted down on a dry-erase board, its not to crazy, but, this is basically how it works.
  1. 11 people put on helmets
  2. All 11 go on the field when the other teams offense is there
  3. when someone gets a ball and starts running, you run over to him and jump on him
  4. the end
Thats free of charge. Gimme a head set! Take a lap.

3) Florida Southern

Still with no football team. So, here is a photo of a guy jumping over cars on a scooter.

4) Arizona State University

The host school for the NCWSA Championship last week got smacked around a bit at California, 24 - 14, to drop their overall record to 2-3. They also have losses to UNLV and Georgia, and they have an upcoming game against USC. So, they will then have a record of 2-4.

Hey, look on the bright side!! At least your starting quarterback is probably going to miss the game with an owwie!!

5) The Purdue Fighting Neckbeards

Serious, it is some sort of weird mixed up world in our current financial crisis and what not as Kyle Orton, the neck beard himself, is playing football in a manner that can be described as "Competent", "Not-Crappy", "Good" and most amazingly...um, "Really Good"

The Purdue football team themselves, honorary alum aside, have only two wins albiet both against powerhouse teams like, Northen Colorado and Central Michigan, but, hey! We cant all be.....

Screw it.


6) UW-Madison

They lost to Ohio State. That makes two straight in-conference losses for a team that was supposed to maybe challange for a national title.

But, HEY!! All is not lost, at least the Marching Band is fun!!

Note, they were suspended for the first time, meaning they didn't play at a home game, for this first time in 40 years, for "inappropriate sexual behavior" Well, that's a shame.


7) Alabama

The number two team in the nation beat Kentucky by 3. 17-10. I am sure that the game was as exciting as this re-cap on a waterski website.
"We're certainly happy to win, but we also put on a clinic today on how to keep the other team in the game," said Alabama head coach Nick Saban. "There are a lot of lessons for us to learn today, and it's great to be able to learn those lessons and not have to lose."
YES!! Thats the kinda coach speak that makes me wanna run through a wall! ROLLL TIDDE!!

8) University of Texas

They haven't lost yet, last week defeating Colorado by about a jillion points and making these girls very happy.

When we contacted them for their thoughts on the game they said,



Comment like crazy!! We got another weekend post coming up soon!

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous11:13 AM

    Texas you need to ski well, stay in the top 8. And ASU...


Speak now. Give us your tired your hungry your weak. We will make them into CRB Staff

Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...