Jul 2, 2008

I'd Hit That

Some things out there seem so damn simple, yet, so genius at the same time. Freddy Krueger's website has a little retail store front in it that sells this shirt, little picture of a jump and says "I'd Hit That".

Gaah! How could no one have thought of this sooner!

Its like upside down ranch and shampoo bottles, so damn simple, yet, no one thought of it.

Anyways, there is a bunch of stuff in his little store that is pretty cool, nothing tops the sexual innuendo of the t-shirt, but, its worth a look.

In related news, this shirt got the CRB crew thinking, and below is a list of other things that we would also, you know, like to hit.

Home Run: Doesn't every little kid dream of hitting a home run, or, more specifically a game winning home run, or a world series clinching home run, or even better, a world series clinching home run and then reveling in the spoils of groupies and champagne?

We think yes.

Danielle Lloyd: She is one of the so-called "wags" or wives and girlfriends, its an English, British, type term that describes the uber rich girlfriends and wives of soccer players. As if you needed more reasons to hate the pansy soccer players, like Ronaldo. The CRB hates that term, we prefer to refer to her with easier acronyms, like, Hot or Smoking Hot, or Sexy or, you know, our future wife.

Regardless, this lady is hot as the surface of the sun and in the non-physical / get your freak-on way, the CRB would like to hit that. If faking an injury and rolling around in the grass like a gigantic cry-baby as if we had just been snipered in the leg/ankle/butt is what it takes, well, consider the CRB snipered.

A Wide-Receiver: There is nothing better in football then a balls out beat down from a safety on a wide-receiver or tight-end, whatever, when some dude gets layed out its just awesome. There is no way that sometimes you don't wish to be someone like Rodney Harrison or Roy Williams and line up a receiver and put the wood to him.

Note: You could put all three CRB members together and we wouldn't make up enough of a bad-ass to do this, but, it would be cool anyways.

Pizza Dough: ummm...pizza. The staple of any decent and healthy diet, the pizza is, and forever will be, basically its own damn food pyramid. Serious, its got all the stuff on it that any growing person needs to sustain life. AND, you put whatever you dont eat in the fridge and its just as tasty if not better cold.

Oh, and the jack-asses that claim that Chicago-style or New York or whatever is real pizza, the CRB says this, "screw you, you are an idiot" The best pizza is whatever the hell you want. Put some chicken wings, hard boiled eggs or taco-bell hard shell tacos on it. It doesn't matter. Its all good, in fact, we bet that a deep-dish pizza with extra cheese and a chocalate shake on it would be pretty decent.

Drum: Boom Boom Boom. If you were to break down the heavily fortified doors of the CRB mansion and force us at gunpoint to join a marching band, we would choose either the Tuba or the big-ass drum. Its pretty hard to be cool when blowing on a trombone or flute or something. But, a big bad-ass drum? Sure!

Besides, how hard is it. What sort of music do you read? You just bash away as hard as you can for awhile, then, proceed to groupies. Check and Mate.

Well, thats our list. Did we forget anything?

What? Hmm, the CRB I.M is blinking....

CRB has entered the chat room.

tailwag: C'mon, I wanna go rollerblading baby!!

RowRowyourboat: Sorry! Just lacing up my skates!

tailwag: No prob, I will wait for you!

Have I mentioned how I love your brilliant use of ITC style of writing at the same time WBMS?


RowRowyourboat: /pumps fist


  1. Really, there is nothing out there that any wants to hit? I nailed the entire list of hittable things? C'MON!!

    I would also add to my list, a demolition derby. I would totally smash the hell out of other cars.

  2. Anonymous12:17 PM

    Barney the purple dinosaur.

    I have nothing against the guy, or the TV program, and really any sort of kid programming is fine with me, but how fun would it be to give a good swing at his head and watch it spin around?

  3. Barney, not a bad suggestion.

  4. Listening him him say "Hey kids, watch me pummel the shit out of that punk" While in the midst of a sing-alond would be priceless as well


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