Mar 4, 2008

Breaking News!! Favre to Compete in U.S Open of Ski Racing!!

The stunning news surrounding Brett Favres retirement has sent shock waves throughout the pro-football community.

It will be felt wide and deep for the die-hard fans of the Green Bay Packers.

However, what is lost in all the flowery articles and heart-felt platitudes about the iconic quarterback of the Packers is that he is not actually retiring from competitive sport.

While it has been noted that Favre retired because he is "Mentally Exhausted" and couldnt bring himself to prepare himself both physically and mentally to compete at the highest level and strive to get the Packers to the super bowl, it has gone largely unnoticed that he is in fact going to be competing at the U.S Open of Ski Racing on Mission Bay in San Diego, California.

In a statement, exclusively to the CRB, Favre's agent said:

"While the news of his retirement from Pro-Football is big news, and he knows that there will be alot of heart-broken Packer fans, he decided to follow his true love, his one true passion, Ski Racing,"

While that may go against what millions have fans have witnessed for the past 17 years, his fiery passion on the field and competitive instinct, it was really just the bottled up frustration over his unability to compete in competitive Ski Racing.

"Have you seen the price of Gas?," Favres agent asked rhetorically. "Its just skyrocketed recently, coupled with the upkeep of the 1,000 horsepower motors and equipment to compete in this amazing sport safely and competitively, has kept Favre on the football field, gunslinging passes and iron-manning football games and whatever non-sense announcers blabber on about during broadcasts."

So why now?

"Well, you only have one shot to reach for immortality...that doesn't come on a football field," Favre's agent said. "It comes on the rough water of Misson Bay in San Diego...a true testament to the iron-will and eternal glory that is Ski Racing."


  1. Anonymous2:19 PM

    whoa...crazy. and I had him pegged for more of a show ski or hydrofoil guy myself. Who knew?

  2. Anonymous4:27 PM

    speed skiing? well i guess if you have no problem letting 300 plus pound line men knock the shit out of you, 100mph on the water would be a picnic.

    or not.

  3. Congrats to Brett. As a Bears fan, I have hated Brett for 16 years. But this would finally put me on the Favre bandwagon.

    Do you think he will wear a #4 bib?

  4. Bears or Packers, both pussies. GO DOLPHINS

  5. Anonymous1:39 PM

    Do you think Favre will join the bib chaser group on facebook? That would more like be Mark Chumura...

  6. chumura is the ODB fishermans hero.

  7. Instead fo the packers helmet, he should wear one of those yellow wedge-of-cheese hats. Mad aerodynamics!

  8. Im all about hot tubs and baby sitters. GO CHUMURA

  9. Anonymous11:06 PM

    I did not hear anything about speed skiing in the press confrence today. Is there going to be another press confrence to announce Favre's switch in sports?


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