Jun 22, 2006

Straight up and down like six o'clock

Mandy meet Regina...Regina meet Mandy.

Never let it be said that the Boathouse people aren't first with breaking news in the waterski world.

Like, two weeks ago Mandy Nightingale set two pending Women's trick records, While at the same time, THE EXACT SAME TIME...or more likely the same week-end, Regina Jaquess (pronounced Jaquess) set a pending slalom record of 3 at 39.5 off.

In doing so she bested or pending besteded her own world record of 2.25 bouys at 39.5.

***Side note - Would it kill usawaterski.com to put some pictures with their stories? Its much harder to write funny waterski stuff and put in pics if we have to do all the work ourselves.***

If you remember we made a big deal about the guys at collegiate all-stars and their performances, but, dudes you best step it up, Regina and Mandy just mopped the floor with yo bust ass trick ski and slalom ski attached to a mop and dipped in that nasty water they use at fast food restaurants and then clean the floor with it using your trick ski and....ugh....*dizzy*

Why didn't I go to Devry and get that sweet computer tech degree? Geek Squad in the house playa!!

So, want to feel even worse about this nonsense? Mandy isnt just a great skiier, but also was a member of the University of Colorado basketball team.

While I think she looks more natural in her ski gear then in a basketaball jersey, its still impressive none the less.

Messed around and got a triple-double

Around here though thats nothing, see, every summer when I break out my street ball gear and go by the name "The Professor", even Skip to my lou himself....thats playground legend Rafer Alston fo all y'all bitchs, won't step his game to my level.

Not to be outdone, if you check out Regina's Bio, its states that not only was she a star point guard for her high school team but also has the nickname cheese.

She seems like a tough girl not to like, here are some highlights from her website. With our hysterical and accurate thoughts in {these things}.

Pet: Stoney, Chocolate Lab, born on the Bayou DeSiard, August, 2002 {Dogs Rule}

Favorite NASCAR Nextel Cup Drivers: Jeff Gordon and Jimmy Johnson; Kyle Busch, Brian Vickers, and Dale Jr. (With these guys, one of my drivers wins more often than not) {Kyle Busch? No Way, one demerit point on Regnina}

Favorite Cuisine: Mexican {Damn straight!! Demerit point removed!!}

Least Favorite Food: Hamburgers {Ugh...demerit point put back..unless she meant only if she meant she loves cheeseburgers...then no points lost.}

Favorite Beach: Beaches of South Walton, FL (Destin) {.....o.k?}

Best Vehicle: Anything with a Chevy logo, but an SS Silverado is pretty cool, then again, so is a Corvette Convertible. {CHEVY KICKS ASS...two points!!}

Best Ski Boat: MasterCraft Pro Star 197, without question the best tournament ski boat on the planet {$20 bucks she is sponsered by them. Shameless.}

Just checked and yes she is sponsered by Mastercraft along with...Holy Crap...
//Blink blink...

MasterCraft, Chevrolet, GM Vortec Engines, GOODE Skis, Indmar, Wiley Bindings, Speedo, Performance Ski & Surf of Orlando, Intensity, Cory Pickos World Ski Center, Masterline, Bunkaps, Smith Optics, Girls4Sport, and Red Bar.

Does Vortec just ship her engines in crates? YO!! QUIT HOGGING THE MOTORS!!

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, its off the Regina Jaquess (pronounced Jaquess) house I go!

Meanwhile, Mandy goes for quality over quantity with Mastercraft, O'Brien and O'Neil...That was taken from the USAWaterski page, however, it looks like she skis for D3 now...

Also, and for the god's sake, leave some accolades for the rest of us...get this.

Career Basketball:
Finished University of Colorado Basketball Career 9th in points scored (1,386), 2nd in 3-point field goals made (224), 3rd in Free Throws made (420), 5th in Free Throw Percentage (.825), 3rd in assists (483), 5th in Assists Average (3.9), and 10th in Steals (169)

2003 - Colorado Sports Woman of the Year (basketball)
2003 - Voted #6 in the University of Colorado Women's Basketball Best Buffaloes Ever

2002 - University of Colorado Female Athlete of the Year
2002 - Colorado's 18 th 1,000 point scorer
2002 - Drafted 3 rd round to the Portland Fire
Well played ladies, indeed.

Pickos International Cup (Usawaterski.com)
Scorebook (Usawaterski.com)
Regina Jaquess (Reginajaquess.com)
Mandy Q & A (Gballmag.com)


  1. Anonymous1:09 PM

    so the pic you have for regina slaloming is actually natalie hamrick. notice the malibu logo on the bottom of the F1 ski. might be a little odd for a girl sponsered by MasterCraft and Goode to use that combination.

  2. Anonymous12:05 AM

    Isn't that slalom pict at the top of this article Natalie Hamrick not Regina Jaquess? Regina slaloms on a goode, not connelly. Oh well, they both are amazing...

  3. Hmm...could be...Yeah, probably. Damn. Busted. They don't even look the same, must have been drunk.

    Well played mr. anonymous.

  4. Anonymous1:33 AM

    haha, an honorable excuse


Speak now. Give us your tired your hungry your weak. We will make them into CRB Staff

Its to Dang Cold!

Enjoy this weather you hot piece of ass! Dispatch from the CRB weather desk Guess what???  ITS COLDER THEN A WELL DIGGERS ASS OUT THERE KIDS...